It's the end of Spring Break, and I have spent the week lounging in my dorm room, watching movies, and (occasionally) studying. But unlike me, my roommate went to Disney World. So after recovering from a bout of jealousy, I began thinking of all my favorite childhood movies and characters. And honestly, I have one question: What the hell is going on in Disney movies?

1. "The Little Mermaid": do mer-people not have utensils?

Ariel's use of the dinglehopper--AKA a fork--was one of my childhood favorites. I don't know why I found it so hilarious, but I specifically remember cackling with glee during that scene. But if Ariel doesn't know what a fork is...do they not have utensils under the sea? And if that's true, then how do they eat?

2. Why doesn't Ariel explain everything to Eric in writing?

We know she can read and write, because she signed her name to Ursula's contract. So why oh why didn't she just grab a napkin and a pen from the castle? Seriously, the movie could've been over sooo much sooner.

3. "Cinderella": How did the glass slipper literally only fit her?

Was her foot severely tiny or massively huge? Purportedly she was the last woman to try it on in the whole kingdom, so are you seriously trying to tell me that no one else's foot fit in that shoe?

4. "Toy Story": If Buzz Lightyear really didn't think he was a toy, then why did he freeze like the other toys?

Literally the entire plot revolves around Buzz denying that he's a toy, but somehow he knows to freeze when there are humans nearby? Why, Buzz, WHY?

5. "Wall-E": Why is he the only machine left on Earth?

Plot twist: Wall-E killed all the other machines, and will now commence his murder spree of the space machines.

6. "Up!": Who is supposed to be watching Russell?

We know his dad is pretty absent, and his stepmom thinks Russell bothers him too much, but are we really supposed to believe that no one noticed he'd disappeared? And when he finally reappeared, they were all okay enough with his KIDNAPPER that they let Carl come to his scouts ceremony? ALSO: if this kid is wandering around the city searching for old people to help, shouldn't someone have been accompanying him?

7. "Mulan": Did no one really notice that there was a woman in their midst?

I mean, yes, she cut her hair. And yes, she kept up pretty well during training, even managing to impress Shang. But after weeks of camping in close quarters, are you seriously telling me that no one even got suspicious? There was never one time that they all went for a pee in the woods and someone realized that Mulan was never around for that?

8. "Snow White": What did all the dwarves do with those diamonds?

Hi HOOOOOw were they not rich as hell after mining diamonds all day every day? Where did they all go? WE NEED ANSWERS.

9. "101 Dalmations": How were Roger and Anita really going to raise 101 puppies?

From what we know, Roger had only sold one song, which makes the economics of the thing impossible. Puppy food and vet fees for a single dog are expensive, how on EARTH could anyone have 101?? How was there room to move in that house? Did they walk every single dog, or was there a massive backyard miraculously in the middle of London that we never saw?

10. Finally: HOW DID THEY ALL FALL IN LOVE SO FAST.

I mean sure, "love at first sight", but seriously? All these kickass princesses really fell in love at the drop of a hat? And even those who took a little longer still fell in love within a few days, at MOST.

I love Disney movies as much as the next person, but they can really be kind of unbelievable. WE NEED ANSWERS, DISNEY.