As I lead my own life into a path of uncertainty I can't help the struggle to move past one or two ideas, I cannot describe the struggle of writing my third paper in here or the fourth by that matter. After putting several hours into my first two I came to the sad conclusion that most of the ideas I felt very passionate about were in those two papers, maybe not in readable shape but I could easily read between the lines of my own thoughts and connect the dots from phrases in there to pretty much everything I have ever felt the necessity to put on paper. As bad as it may sound after just two weeks, the motivation to write anything had left me.
Then out of the blue while I was driving Bob Dylan's Don't Think Twice, Its Alright came on the radio and I had my second paper. During the course of the next week I was on the road, once again, this time driving to California and I was struggling with keeping my mind clear so I could focus on the yet another beautiful sunset as I sat in the car with the radio turned off, I kept thinking and thinking and before I knew it I had a whole article in my head.
To be honest, I'm not a very good writer, I simply enjoy doing it and don't mind spending several hours battling one idea. The one thing I seem to be very good at is paying attention to the details of most things around me, thinking things over and over again, and lately I've come to the realization that if I do so while living in a sort of "emotional realm"; something I heard Gregory Alan Isakov talk about in an interview once, ideas just flow a bit more gently. Because eventually what does it for me is that after hours of struggling with words, I seem to find clarity in my thoughts, something that I can't find any other way.
This is why I feel an incredible sense of admiration for all these songwriters, poets, storytellers, cartoonists and all of the writers out there. To have the opportunity to listen, read and learn the lyrics, stories and poems these guys write is something I will always be thankful for. I cannot believe the ability and creativity with which they manage to compose and articulate sentences of such profound meaning.
Now, I've heard Bob Dylan complaining about people hearing things in his songs that he didn't put in there, or how he wrote Blowing in the wind in just ten minutes and didn't even think about it. then there is Isakov who describes songwriting by saying that a friend used to say "I walk around eating poetry and then I just puke up a song".
So they might not have meant what we thought they meant, but does it really matter?
Words and sentences can assume an endless amount of shapes or forms, and this is why writing, at least to me, is such a beautiful form of meditation. In the same way, that ancient wisdom gets condensed into simple sayings, or how feelings turn into lyrics and poetry. Each word that leaves our mouths or that goes in a paper has a meaning to us and it might have a different meaning to someone else.
Just like most of the essays I write this one turned into something I was not planning on writing, and I guess this article just evolved into a long and complicated thank you note to everyone who is part of this platform; to my editors, fellow writers, to you and to the many writers I will probably never meet but have greatly impacted my life one way or another.
Thank you.