Before I became an actual student at Rowan, I had to come here to audition to be a part of the music program. It was super nerve-wracking, and it made me feel like I was really stretching to try to even come here in the first place.

When I did finally get here in 2014, I was a special admit because I was also an Exploratory Studies student and an athlete. Being an athlete in the music department was such a struggle, and people looked at me differently, even if their intentions were to do the complete opposite. I was specially admitted into the music program here so that I'd be able to finish on time.

Here we are.

My first year here, I was given an advisor under Exploratory Studies, and I was never really told what to do within my major. I didn't think anything of it because I was this random little special admit athlete running on zero sleep. I remember only taking electives for the most part, and only some of my major music classes because of the eight-semester requirements in order to graduate.

All that time, I honestly had no idea I had a different advisor. My sophomore year was when I found out, and by that time, it felt too late. I was an outcast, and I still am.

In the music program, you need to take a sequence of classes to ensure that you're successful. Music fundamentals, sight singing, and ear training. Once you've taken those, you can move on to Theory One and two written, and aural.

When I finally met with the music advisor my sophomore year, I didn't know that I'd be dealing with what seemed like a "high school ex-friend" living in my advisor's body. I'm talking side-eye in the hallway, scoffs, and just outright foul behavior for an advisor, in my opinion.

Just so you get an idea, I took fundamentals Fall of 2015, and Theory One written and aural Fall 2016. I took Theory Two written and aural so many times and withdrew because I felt like I didn't have the correct foundation. It's 2019 and I'm taking Theory Two written and aural again and finally sight singing and ear training, after that class.

It took me until this very semester to recognize how much I've been wronged during my years here at Rowan. To think that because I was a special admit, and an athlete, I was treated differently. It really sucked. This was the final nail in the coffin of my life and ultimately left me with awful anxiety and depression.

Dealing with this specific sequence of classes has caused so much stress on my body, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I hope that with the new music advisor, no one has to go through what I went through.