I feel as if at my age I am at a slight disadvantage when it comes to relationships. I'm not looking for someone to hang all over at parties, tweet mushy gushy stuff about every day, or constantly talk about to all of my friends. (Although if I ever find someone, I will probably do some of these things). I'm searching for different components that some people my age probably wouldn't consider right away. If my "perfect guy" is out there somewhere, this is what I imagine him being like:
1. He has realistic goals.
No, I'm not looking for a man who is filthy rich, drives a $100,000 car, or wears a suit every day. I'm talking about someone who's focused on a positive future, has a good idea on what he wants to spend the rest of his life doing, etc.
2. He genuinely cares about me.
This may seem selfish, but I don't mean for it to come off this way. I'm looking for someone who asks about my day not because he "has to," but because he actually wants to know how my day was and what happened during it. If I seem to be having an off day I don't want him asking me what's wrong because he "has to" but because, again, he genuinely cares about me.
3. He supports me.
Too often I see relationships and marriages fail simply because of lack of support. I think this factor is very important. If I end up in a career that doesn't make me six figures a year and prevents us from going on exotic trips every year but it's something I enjoy doing every day, I want the man I'm with to support me with my decisions, as I will return the favor.
4. He sticks around no matter what.
This sounds like marriage, but I think it can apply to early relationships as well. No one should feel as if they are constantly walking on eggshells most of the time, not knowing what actions or words will potentially upset your other half. Also a relationship like this will most likely fail a number of times due to these silly situations. These situations personally taught me that if someone is willing to get up and leave after one situation that didn't please him without an attempt to work it out, then it wasn't meant to be whatsoever.
5. He's fun and spontaneous.
Guys, don't try so hard!!! At least personally, I like when a guy is loose, goes with the flow, and loves to be silly while still having a fun time. If you embarrass yourself, that's okay because chances are us girls are just as worried about embarrassing yourselves in front of you too. Do stupid things together and laugh about it later.
6. He's protective (but not creepy).
When I'm with a guy, I want to feel safe. Personally, I like my space but I really appreciate it when a guy walks me to my car, or to my doorstep after we've gone out. It's the little things.
7. He's interested in me as a person.
If a guy is naturally attracted to me just by appearance, great! But....if this is the only think you like about me, you're wasting both of our times. I want someone who is going to ask about the little things. I'm going to look for someone who finds me "irreplaceable" rather than "sexy". It's really the littlest things that make the biggest difference.
8. He truly knows how to love.
I'm not talking about the love a 19 year old boy has for his XBOX. I'm talking about a passionate love that consists of pieces that fit together to where if a piece is missing you feel a sort of emptiness or wound that needs to be mended. I'm talking about a love that is so great you can not imagine life without it.
9. Sorry, there's no such thing as THE "perfect guy."
I'm not saying YOUR perfect guy isn't out there, because I do like to believe there is someone out there for everyone. However, I AM saying that the "perfect, textbook guy" doesn't exist. Everyone has different tastes, likes, dislikes, passions, etc. I shared these eight components though to show that these are genuine qualities that don't cost anything to own. I hope someday that you all find your "perfect guy" and he possesses at least a few of these factors, because you deserve it.
