For as long as I can remember, there has been some kind of magical surrealism that follows people of color, especially African Americans, around. The idea that we can endure everything that comes our way without having breaking points or feelings of defeat is something that many have; and while we are strong people who have and do endure a lot of things, that does not mean we cannot and do not break. Black women are expected to carry the burdens life lays on us, our men, our friends and family and still be strong. To be a Black woman is to be a mythological creature who faces adversity without ever needing to rest, yet this is so unrealistic. Like ever other human being we grow weary, need support, we suffer from illnesses both physical and mental, it's just that this idea of what kind of load a Black woman can carry is so profound and unrealistic that it makes it harder for people, including other people of color and other Black women to empathize toward certain situations.
Being a Black woman, who suffers from depression, I have learned the biases and stigma that the African American community holds with depression. I cannot begin to count the number of times that I have heard the phrases "Black people don't get depressed," or "Our people have been depressed for centuries. Get over it," This idea that African Americans are immune to depression because of the constant state of oppression that we have been in or because of the expectations that are held due to the magical surrealism that even African Americans believe. I was not aware that my skin color could be the reason as to why I should not feel, do, or be certain things. While there are some people and systems who display bias and do their best to limit African Americans, mental illnesses is not one of those systems. There are many different reasons and ways that individuals become depressed, so saying that I or any other African American should not be depressed because of the color of our skin is absurd. The thought process is that since there has been a constant state of oppression for my people and they have continued to endure that there is no possible way for an African American to feel depressed; Or it is sometimes looked at like this "If African Americans have endured this constant state of oppression and endured, what makes you think they were not depressed while they endured? If they did, so can you". While I am enduring, I am an individual who may or may not be wired differently than those who have come before me, and I may have different coping mechanisms and levels of strength. What is so difficult to understand?
Statements made by individuals who believe that African Americans do not and can not be depressed are rooted in ignorance, and the absurd expectations that come with this magical surrealism that we are somehow born with as people of color needs to be abolished. Yes, African Americans are and do exhibit magical characteristics and qualities, but just as Jesse Williams said in his acceptance speech at the 2016 BET awards, "Just because we're magical, doesn't mean that we aren't real." We are real human beings who are not exempt to mental illness, or anything else life throws our way, so next time you go to tell someone that they should not be depressed because of the color of their skin, the history of their people, etc. Don't.
Here's my advice and plea to anyone who believes that "Black people don't get depressed":
Maybe realize that these things could actually be adding to their depression, try listening to them, or try to somehow be empathetic.
Remember all of the things that African Americans have not been immune to and see that depression is also one of those things that we are not immune to.
Think about your choice of words and what you are saying to a person who is depressed because you may add to the feeling of isolation that depressed individuals sometimes feel.
To wrap it up with one cliché, but true statement, "Always be kind. Everyone is fighting their own battle(s)".
