Demi Lovato Isn't Sober Anymore, But That Doesn't Make Me Love Her Any Less

Demi Lovato Isn't Sober Anymore, But That Doesn't Make Me Love Her Any Less

I stood by her when she entered rehab, and I am standing by her now.

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Demi Lovato took the world by surprise on June 21st with the release of her newest single, "Sober." The song is a heart-wrenching confession to family, friends, and fans that after six years of sobriety from drug and alcohol addiction, Lovato has relapsed.

"Momma, I'm so sorry I'm not sober anymore
And daddy, please forgive me for the drinks spilled on the floor
To the ones who never left me, we've been down this road before
I'm so sorry, I'm not sober anymore."

Lovato entered rehab in October 2010 to seek treatment for her addictions, as well as bipolar disorder, anorexia, bulimia, and self-harm. March 15th, 2013 marked her first anniversary of sobriety, and each year since, Lovato and her fans have celebrated the momentous day together. Just this past March, I had the privilege of attending her Brooklyn concert that took place two days after her six-year anniversary, and the crowd sang an emotional "Happy Birthday" to Demi to honor the day she started her new life of sobriety.

At the end of May, Lovato teased her newest music to fans, saying of her upcoming seventh album, "Some of you may not like or understand my truth but it's me... take it or leave it.." Upon the release of "Sober," Demi captioned her social media posts: "My truth... #sober out now."

"Sober" comes as a shock to all who have followed Lovato's journey the past six years. As a huge fan of Demi, I was utterly heartbroken listening along with tears pouring from my eyes as she admitted her relapse. Since the very beginning of her rise to fame, I have passionately followed and been inspired by Demi. Her music and her story have played tremendous roles in my own mental health journey, and she has always been my beacon of hope reminding me that recovery is possible.

She may not be sober anymore, but Demi is absolutely still my role model. Until you have struggled with addiction first-hand, you know nothing of the courage it takes to even attempt sobriety. It's physically, mentally, and emotionally draining, and it never stops. Each day is a new fight.

Demi fought her heart out for six years, and I will never forget that achievement and abandon her for slipping up. I've followed her journey; I've seen her highest and lowest moments since going into recovery. I stood by her when she entered rehab, and I am sure as hell standing by her now.

"And I'm sorry for the fans I lost
Who watched me fall again
I wanna be a role model, but I'm only human."

The only thing more courageous than sobriety is being able to admit how hard it is. Recovery does not look like a perfect line — it twists and turns, circles around itself and zig-zags, goes up and down. What I've always admired about Demi's journey is that she doesn't sugar-coat it. Mental illness and addiction take people to dark, ugly, scary places, and Demi isn't afraid to be vocal about what those places are like for her. She doesn't just talk about her progress; she talks about her setbacks.

People are willing to support those with mental illness and addiction when recovery looks clean, measurable, and happy. But it is in our darkest moments — the moments that look like failures, the moments when people are most quick to abandon us — that we need the most help. Supporting someone through recovery means staying by their side even when it gets messy, ugly, and painful. There is no destination on the road to recovery, there is only waking up every morning and trying to be better than we were the day before.

I admire Demi's courage, as I always have, to speak her truth regardless of what others think. "Sober" is a brave, raw, and honest confession of what recovery actually looks like. Thank you, Demi, for showing me the strength in vulnerability. Thank you for reminding me that recovery is not always pretty, and that's OK. Thank you for speaking your truth and for giving me the courage to speak mine.

Cover Image Credit:

Demi Lovato / Instagram

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'Baby, It's Cold Outside' Is NOT About Date Rape, It's A Fight Against Social Norms Of The 1940s

The popular Christmas song shouldn't be considered inappropriate.

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The classic Christmas song "Baby, It's Cold Outside" has recently come under attack. There has been controversy over the song being deemed as inappropriate since it has been suggested that it promotes date rape. Others believe that the song is another common example of our culture's promotion of rape. You may be wondering, where did they get that idea from?

The controversy has led to one radio station, WDOK, taking the song off the air and banning it from their station. Some people believe that this song goes against the #MeToo movement since it promotes rape. However, people are not considering the fact that this traditional Christmas song was made in the 1940s.

People are viewing the song from a modern-day cultural perspective rather than from the perspective of the 1940s. "Baby, It's Cold Outside" was written in 1944. Many people have viewed the song from the perspective of our cultural and social norms. People believe that the song promotes date rape because of lyrics that suggest that the male singing is trying to stop the female singer from leaving, and the female singer is constantly singing about trying to escape with verses like "I really can't stay" or "I've got to go home."

When you first view the song from the perspective of today's culture, you may jump to the conclusion that the song is part of the date rape culture. And it's very easy to jump to this conclusion, especially when you are viewing only one line from the song. We're used to women being given more freedom. In our society, women can have jobs, marry and be independent. However, what everyone seems to forget is that women did not always have this freedom.

In 1944, one of the social norms was that women had curfews and were not allowed to be in the same house as a man at a later time. It was considered a scandal if a single woman so much as stayed at another man's house, let alone be in the same room together. It's mind-blowing, right? You can imagine that this song was probably considered very provocative for the time period.

"Baby, It's Cold Outside" is not a song that encourages date rape, but is actually challenging the social norms of society during the time period. When you listen to the song, you notice that at one part of the song, the female states, "At least I can say that I tried," which suggests that she really doesn't want to leave. In fact, most of the song, she is going back and forth the whole time about leaving stating, "I ought to say no…well maybe just a half a drink more," and other phrases.

She doesn't want to leave but doesn't really have a choice due to fear of causing a scandal, which would have consequences with how others will treat her. It was not like today's society where nobody cares how late someone stays at another man's house. Nowadays, we could care less if we heard that our single neighbor stayed over a single man's house after 7. We especially don't try to look through our curtain to check on our neighbor. Well, maybe some of us do. But back then, people did care about where women were and what they were doing.

The female singer also says in the lyrics, "The neighbors might think," and, "There's bound to be talk tomorrow," meaning she's scared of how others might perceive her for staying with him. She even says, "My sister will be suspicious," and, "My brother will be there at the door," again stating that she's worried that her family will find out and she will face repercussions for her actions. Yes, she is a grown woman, but that doesn't mean that she won't be treated negatively by others for going against the social norms of the time period.

Then why did the male singer keep pressuring her in the song? This is again because the song is more about challenging the social norms of the time period. Both the female and male singers in the song are trying to find excuses to stay and not leave.

On top of that, when you watch the video of the scene in which the song was originally viewed, you notice that the genders suddenly switch for another two characters, and now it's a female singer singing the male singer's part and vice versa. You also notice that the whole time, both characters are attracted to one another and trying to find a way to stay over longer.

Yes, I know you're thinking it doesn't matter about the genders. But, the song is again consensual for both couples. The woman, in the beginning, wants to stay but knows what will await if she doesn't leave. The male singer meanwhile is trying to convince her to forget about the rules for the time period and break them.

In addition, the complaint regarding the lyric "What's in this drink?" is misguided. What a lot of people don't understand is that back in 1944, this was a common saying. If you look at the lyrics of the song, you notice that the woman who is singing is trying to blame the alcoholic drink for causing her to want to stay longer instead of leaving early. It has nothing to do with her supposed fear that he may have tried to give her too much to drink in order to date rape her. Rather, she is trying to find something to blame for her wanting to commit a scandal.

As you can see, when you view the song from the cultural perspective of the 1940s, you realize that the song could be said to fight against the social norms of that decade. It is a song that challenges the social constrictions against women during the time period. You could even say that it's an example of women's rights, if you wanted to really start an argument.

Yes, I will admit that there were movies and songs made back in the time period that were part of the culture of date rape. However, this song is not the case. It has a historical context that cannot be viewed from today's perspective.

The #MeToo movement is an important movement that has led to so many changes in our society today. However, this is not the right song to use as an example of the date rape culture.

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All 6 Of Beyonce's Looks From The Global Citizen Festival Prove She Is Still 'Queen-Bey'

Did I mention that it was all HAND-EMBROIDERED with Swarovski crystals?

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Beyonce means business when it comes to festivals. The Global Citizen Festival was no different, with her custom looks thanks to her team Jenke Ahmed Tailly and Zerina Ackers. Featuring her Atelier Versace catsuit and sequin encrusted suit that featured a map of Africa's fifty-four countries. Beyonce is all about detail, that's why the internet goes crazy when she headlines a festival. Just like she'll never wear the same thing twice, she'll never perform the same way twice.

This festival commemorates one-hundred years since Nelson Mandela's birth. Celebrating his philanthropic and political career while also partying it up with Beyonce and Jay. Throughout the night Bey went through six outfit changes that paid tribute to Africa.

1. Quiteria & George

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Finishing the night with an emerald green Quiteria & George cape dress covered in hundreds of crystals. Proving once again that she can wear any color she pleases.

2. Ashi Studio

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Taking a break from Jay and switching it up for a sweet duet with Ed Sheeran. Wearing a fuschia Ashi Studio gown covered in ruffled tulle for a unique silhouette.

3. Esteban Cortazar

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Pulling out the third look with a highly beaded Esteban Cortazar mini dress accessorizing with traditional Ndebele neck rings. Some took to the internet saying it resembled the Nola costume from the Broadway musical The Lion King which she'll be starring in the live action hit movie next year.

4. Mary Katramtzou

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A personal favorite from the night, a Mary Katramtzou's puff-sleeved sequined bodysuit featuring all 54 African countries on the cape and a pair of thigh-high boots to finish off the look. Did I mention that it was all HAND-EMBROIDERED with Swarovski crystals?

5. Atelier Versace

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Okay, another favorite as well, Atelier Versace catsuit. Featuring a top hat and every color of the rainbow represented within her group of backup dancers. But the yellow is the icing on the cake!

6. Oliver Rousteing

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And last but not least custom Balmain. One of many pieces she has worn by Olivier Rousteing which featured plenty of feathers and Egyptian hieroglyphs.

All of these looks are iconic and different from the last. Beyonce continues to be the front-runner of high-fashion on the stage and off.

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