The Delusions Every Girl Has When Menstruating

I think (not trying to assume anything here) that many females who have experienced a period in their lifetime have suffered from at least one if not all of these delusions.

I don’t know if it is the hormones or some weird form of a group thing, but tried and true, every single girl I have talked to about these situations has responded with, “YES, me every month,” or some variation of that comment.

So whether you’re a curious male or a blood sister enjoy some of these ridiculous but true thoughts conjured up by the female mind.

There are those gals who track their cycle and anticipate the coming flood like Noah:

Alright period, according to my app you are scheduled for arrival in t-minus one day.

A day passes…

I’m pregnant.

And then there are those who like to add a little suspense to their month/don’t mind doing laundry who happen upon a conversation such as this:

Friend: Ugh I’m on my period and feeling so gross. Second days, am I right?
Her: Lol ugh that sucks. Yeah my last period was… like… over a month ago, I think.
S*** I’M PREGNANT.

The one who half-a**edly participates in period-rants but doesn’t really care or overthink the timeframes:

Yeah I like to go-with-the-flow (period pun) and I don’t feel any side-effects from my period either.

*goes into a room alone*

Yeah I’ve never been more pregnant and I will be having a child in nine months.

My personal favorite, the one who hasn’t had sex.

My period isn’t late, I just ate a big lunch, I am on day 10 and I have never had sex with a male with the ability to conceive.
And the answer to your question is yes, I am pregnant.

So basically the point here is that every woman is currently pregnant.

Just kidding, the real point is that there are a lot of women who unrealistically think that they are pregnant at any given moment. And there’s really nothing anyone can do to convince them/we/us otherwise.