While mindlessly scrolling through my phone one day, something occurred to me: An hour of my time had gone by and I didn’t even realize until it was too late. The word document in front of me sat blank. I became angry with myself, yet I continued to check up on those who never bothered to check up on me. I kept scrolling, looking for something new. Like an addiction, I wanted more. I would spend hours looking at pictures of peers posing in the mirror, skewing my perception of beauty. It became a habit to question myself more than others. As a result, I was mentally exhausted from the garbage that I surrounded myself with.
So, without even thinking, I deleted the apps.
It was a very strange feeling to open my phone and see a half-empty screen. I kept Snapchat simply as another way I could communicate with people.
The first week, I would catch myself grabbing my phone just to unlock it. I would snap out of confusion when I realized that the apps were gone. My hands literally had a mind of their own.
By temporarily removing social media, I began to notice how much time I had throughout the day. You never realize how precious it is until you finally get a moment to be alone without distractions.
Surprisingly enough, I also experienced withdrawal symptoms. I became antsy and feared boredom.
One thing I noticed was that the quality of my mental health began to improve. It did not clear up my self-esteem issues, but it gave me more time to focus on myself rather than others. I felt free from judgment when I deleted these apps.
I didn’t permanently delete them. I have gotten to the point where I only use them on the weekends. Small doses of social media can be relaxing after I’ve worked for it.
So as I reflect on this experiment, I can conclude that social media had a definite hold on me. It controlled every aspect of my life, including my mental health and my schoolwork. I am beginning to realize that moderation is key when it comes to something as addictive as this.
We should all learn how to control our addiction to social media so that it doesn't control us.
