Daddy's Girl

Dear daddy, (baby)

I never ask you to love my mommy, never asked you to make her your wife.

But I am really glad that you loved her so much, I'm glad you both gave me life.

Daddy, I saw you today, you came in my room, to kiss me before you went to work.

I love you daddy, all the time, even though mommy thinks your a jerk.

2 years later. 2 years old

Dear daddy,

I never asked you to be here, never asked you to stay, I can feel the tension rising each and every day. My momma she yells at you again and again. I see the pain behind your eyes. The nasty things she says to you, just to get a rise.

Daddy, I saw you today, leaving again, you looked back when you got to the door. I was there looking at you so you knelt down to me on the floor. You told me you loved me and you held me real tight. "You'll be my princess till I die" then you turned and walked out the door and it made both me and mommy cry

2 years later 5 years old

Dear daddy, I never asked you to stay strong, never asked you to fight for what you and my mommy once had. I'm so tired of the arguing and fighting. All this yelling makes me sad.

Daddy, I saw you today, your blood pressure rise, as mommy started in again. I don't understand why you keep on fighting, daddy please, let her win. I saw you resist the urge to hit her, I saw you storm out of the house. You didn't see me watching you daddy, I was as quiet as a mouse.

3 years later 8 years old

Dear daddy, I never asked you to work these things out, I never wanted all of this. You and mommy can't even talk, let alone hug or kiss. My mommy she hates you, she wants you gone. She tells you everyday. But Daddy, I still love you with all of my heart, and I really want you to stay.

Daddy, I saw you today when you lost your temper, I saw you hit the wall. Mommy kept pushing you with all that she had. I saw my mommy fall. I heard the sound the impact made, when you "set my mother right". I couldnt be mad when she asked you to leave and find somewhere else to sleep tonight.

2 years later 10 years old

Dear daddy,

I never asked you to move out, I never ever wanted you to go. I ask my mommy all the time if I can see you, but she just tells me no. I miss you tonight, and all the time, I tend to wait by the phone. Cause I know that you call fairly often, and I know how you hate mommy's tone.

Daddy, I saw you today for just a second, you came to get some more stuff. My mommy just flung them out of the door, she screams she's had enough. She won't let you see me, she holds me back, as I try to run out the door. She let me go when your tires squealed off. I just cried on the floor.

5 years later 15 years old.

Dear daddy,

I never asked you to leave me here with mom, I always wanted to go. You know how hard mom is to deal with. Please just let me know. Can I come home with you? Can't I just leave? All of Mom's boyfriend's have been jerks. She's out of control, she party's a lot and now nobody works.

Daddy I saw you today for just a pause, shopping at the store. I wanted to run to you, beg you to take me, but mom said you don't want me any more. She told me you left because of me, I didn't love you enough. She said if I wanted you to come back I needed to make money and be tough.

3 years later (age 18)

Dear daddy,

I never asked you for much, all I wanted was a little of your time. So many years have past since I heard your voice on the other line. I have attempted to call you a couple of times, but your voicemail said "it wasn't worth the fight". My mother taught me how to survive, but I know it isn't right. She gave me the tools I needed to make sure that I will forget, then she said "just relax, those guys will take what they can get."

Daddy, I saw you today walking downtown with your new baby and wife. You saw me too but you didn't realize that this is all that is left of my life. You hurried your family past my corner, you rushed them to the car. I stand there with water running down my face, wondering how I even got this far. My mother went missing some time ago. I don't think she is coming back. I need to get my life together again. I need to get back on track.

10 years later (28 years)

Dear daddy,

I never asked to be here daddy, you brought me into this life. You chose create me with my mother, your wife. You decided to leave us behind in your past. It seems like only yesterday, all these years went by so fast. You chose to leave me alone to learn from that whore. And now thats what I know and you don't want me anymore?

Daddy I saw you today, walking in the park. You were helping your son practice throwing the ball. I see how proud you are of him. You are not proud of me at all. As I approached you, I saw your face. First nothing, then suddenly aware, shock, saddness, then finally disgrace. You glanced down at your son in panic, begging me with everything you had. I stopped halfway there, how can you be my dad? I sat down on a bench, barely able to stand anymore. My hands and legs are shaking. My motor skills seem poor. You sat down right beside me, and sent my brother to go play.You asked me how I had been doing. I said "I take it day by day". I asked you if you still loved me, if I'm still your princess till you die? I saw your eyes swell, I wanted you to cry. You said that you were sorry, you didn't really know what to do. I just fell apart again, right there in front of you.

You reached out to hold me, I tell you not to bother, because of your choices, I grew up without a father.

Dear daddy, 7 years later 35 years old

I never asked you to move on without me. I never wanted to survive. Sometimes duing the trials of life I had wished I wasn't even alive. I made the best of what I got, which wasn't very much. I had to learn the right way to live and I never had a crutch. I finally found a husband that treats me like a queen. He is warm, loving and loyal. We work well as a team. He isnt always around and i miss him tremendously. He has given me everything, even a pregnancy.

I'm really scared to tell him, we are expecting another life. I just know I will be a good mother he says I make a great wife.

Daddy I saw you today walking along with your wife and son. I wasn't sure what to do, I just wanted to run. You didn't seem nervous, they didn't look upset. I didn't understand. They didn't know me yet? When you approached me, your smile seemed so smug. Then you inturduced us, and gave me an awkward hug. I stood with my shoulders back, my tummy showing just a bump. You lifted your hand to pat me, I couldn't help but jump. Your family seemed so loving. They accepted me so fast. They didn't ask me any questions about my mother or my past. You asked me about my baby, my new reason for living. I'm excited but I'm terrified, not to be unforgiving. I don't want my little baby, to grow up to be alone. I want them to have a supportive family and a loving home. You look me in the eyes. "I won't be leaving you again" my emotions overcome me but I still try to hold it in.

6 months later.

Dear daddy, I never asked you to accept me again, I didn't ask you to come along. I was so scared to go alone, I was relieved that you offered to help me be strong. Ever since that phone call, shattered my world again, I'm so happy to have had you. As my father and my friend. You were so kind just to hold me, to help carry me ahead. I'm not sure what would have happened if you weren't there when they told me he was dead. My husband, my little family, my whole world was all falling apart. Am i strong enough to go on with this broken heart? You and my unborn son, the only things that keep it all together. My one last chance to start again, with you beside me, forever.

Daddy I saw you today for the last time, I saw your painful end. You came with me to my doctor to be there as a my friend. We found out today, the baby is healthy and that he is indeed a boy. Its still so sad, his father is gone. I know he will feel a void. We leave the doctor together, running a little behind. I was deep in thought on the way home. I had so much on my mind. A semi pulled out in front of us. I didn't act quick enough. I swerved the car and hit the breaks, but the hit we took was rough. The semi hit my father's side, a pain shot down my spine. I woke up sometime later, not sure what day or time. When I woke, i felt so much pain, I could barely move a finger. I heard the machines beeping,and the smell of alcohol still lingers. Then suddenly I remembered the tragedy before. My machines start beeping louder. The pain is suddenly so much more. Nurse comes running in, she sticks a needle in my arm, suddenly, my eye lids weigh a ton. I try to fight with fleeting thoughts but it's not long before the medications have won.

Heroin

A young girl, day after day, did drugs because they helped take the pain away.

Even though she knew she wasn't worth a damn, she still prayed to God every night that someone would understand.

Even though her pain hides behind a breath taking smile, she did drugs to keep it hidden all the while.

At night, in her husbands shirt she lies alone, remembering the day she found out he wasn't coming home.

He was a solider and he fought until the end. Unknowing he left his pregnant wife alone to fend.

Time went by. She was coping, but not well. Her pregnancy was healthy. Her tummy started to swell.

One day she was driving and CRASH!!! things went black. She woke up some days later, in the hospital, with a broken back.

The baby didn't make it. Neither did her heart. Her family has all left her. Now she is falling apart.

The pain pills that they gave her, made her numb, but they didn't do the trick. A man she met said he would "save her" and never again did she feel so sick.

The drugs that he gave her, made her forget the pain. Everyday she would take so much, she finally went insane.

Before long she took so much, she really couldn't stand. Now she is with her son and husband, in that same patch of land.