Dear boy that broke my heart,

I think that it's time you know something. I am finished blaming me. I shouldn't have to and I am not going to. See, here's the thing about "love." It's not perfect. Heck, it's not even always easy. But you tricked me. When you said that you "loved" me, you forgot to mention that it was only until things got a little hard. When you said that you "loved" me, you didn't tell me that it was only going to be while everything was going good. When you said you "loved" me, you failed to explain how one day you were going to unlove me.

See, that's the thing about "love." We always forget those small but very important details. By definition, love is an intense feeling of deep connection for someone. By that definition, yeah I loved you. I even think that you loved me too. So, what happened? Where did we go wrong? What gave you the right to stop loving me?

I guess this is where you want me to apologize. Fine, I will. I'm sorry that I'm not perfect. I'm even sorry that I'm not really close. I'm sorry that I got jealous of all of the girls who flirted with you. I'm sorry that I was too stubborn. I'm sorry that I got upset really easily.

Yeah, I guess I could've been better. But that's not all that I'm sorry for. I'm sorry that I held you when you cried and dried your tears. I'm sorry that I believed you when you said you'd never hurt me. I'm sorry that I melted when you called me beautiful. I'm sorry that I read and reread all of those countless letters. I'm sorry that those hundreds of years had to come so fast.

Im sorry that I accepted you fully for the man that you were and all that you desired to become. I'm sorry that I thought I finally had gotten something right. I'm sorry that I can't look at a piano or step on a leaf or get ginger ale out of the pop machine without thinking about how you wrecked me. And, I'm sorry that you stopped loving me.

But that, my friend, is not my fault. I gave you everything that I had. Yes, that everything included some flaws, but it also included a whole lot of love and I would've loved you for a long, long time. The saddest part about it all is I would probably love you again.

That's because loving you was suffocating. No no, not suffocating, loving you was blinding. Don't get me wrong, I wanted to love you, I was in love with you but I couldn't see that I was trapped. I didn't understand that love didn't make you feel sad. I couldn't see that love should be guiltless. I didn't understand what an unhealthy relationship was. I just thought that I loved you and that if I never felt good enough, it was okay because I was lucky enough to have you.

Loving you made me lose myself, but here I am booger. Bigger and better than I was. See, you were right about a few things. I am stunning, I do deserve the world, I am a great person to spend the day with, my eyes are beautiful, I am the physical embodiment of hope and strength, and I do rap Macklemore better than any girl in your future. You may have hurt me, but that's the funny thing about pain. It teaches you things. It shows you just how unbreakable you are.

So, I'm sorry that I loved you and I'm sorry that you didn't know how to love me back. And I'm sorry that our common love for Twenty One Pilots and hate for Donald Trump wasn't enough to hold us together. But hey, that's life. And despite what you think, it is a little funny. P.s. I love having my picture taken.