The Cons Of Greek Life People Don't Talk About

If My Daughter Ends Up Joining A Sorority, Well, Good Luck Charlie

If my future daughter does end up reading this, I hope you know I will always support you.

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If I ever have a child, I will support them with whatever their passion is. I will be there cheering for them whether it be in the stands of a high school sporting event, or just cheering them on at home as they crush their mountain of homework.

Spring semester of my freshman year, I decided to rush. At the time, I had a small group of friends but wanted to expand my circle. I tried joining a few clubs my first semester, but I was really isolating myself in my dorm room to study and occasionally getting something to eat. I craved more, and going out for spring recruitment seemed like the perfect opportunity to force myself to make friends.

If you knew me back in high school, I was so against the concept of Greek life. My mother was in a sorority when she was in college, and it just never appealed to me. I never had the pressure to become a legacy, or that it was something every college girl had to do as a way to get boys. I didn't like the idea of conformity or paying for friends essentially. It just wasn't how I picked my college experience.

After receiving my bid though, I call what I entered the honeymoon phase. Everything seemed perfect. From the moment I walked into the bid day celebration, I felt like I made the right decision. I dreamed of maybe being on the executive board and making a huge difference for my campus's Greek community. All the girls I would call my "sisters" were just warm and welcoming, and I felt like I had found my place. I was just over the moon. I even was so "in love" that I ended up writing a handful of articles about the perks of Greek life.

And I am not here saying the whole experience was bad. Everyone has different experiences and every chapter is different. You really do get what you put into it. I ended up with an amazing big and little to match. Those two are actually like sisters to me, and I couldn't imagine my life without them. I also gained the most amazing friends who constantly support me despite being an alumna of my sorority now. There are benefits to Greek life, trust me.

However, there is a dark side to Greek life nobody mentions. You will fall out of that honeymoon phase, falling out of love with your sorority. You may even question why you joined in the first place. I know I do sometimes. At least for me, I was pressured into fitting into an image, one where I was meant to be happy all the time. I was even confronted by a few sisters who spread rumors about me because they mistook my anxiety and started to spread rumors I was gossiping even if I was just expressing my frustration with someone standing in front of me.

There was a period of my life where I just wasn't okay. A few people I let into that chaotic period of my life and some of them were my sisters and people I was told to "trust." Yet, some of these people didn't have my full trust. They told me I needed to learn to control my anxiety better without asking me what was bothering me. They didn't take the time to find out that I was struggling with a shooting back home that just rocked my world. I was anxious because I constantly worried about myself, my parents, and people back home. I lost motivation in school. I couldn't sleep. And somehow, I was still the bad guy because I wasn't happy all the time. Someone at my school's tech center saw me upset and believed I was spreading rumors, which is so far from the truth.

My experience with Greek life was far from picture perfect at the end of my journey in my sorority. There are times I still question why I convinced myself to sign up for recruitment, but there are days I am thankful for at least the experience because of the people it brought into my life.

If my future daughter does end up reading this, I hope you know I will always support you. However, it is important to realize that despite all the positives a situation may have, there can also be negatives. Not everything in life will end up being picture perfect. Whatever you choose to do, I will be your shoulder to cry on or your best friend to share the joy with you.

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Cover Image Credit: ASMR Darling//YouTube

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I'm A Sorority Girl And A ROTC Member, It's The Best Of Both Worlds

Instead of only being in ROTC or only being involved in Greek life, why not be part of both?

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I feel like I live a double life. Some weekends I spend going to date parties and sports games. Other weekends, I am stuck in a field doing land navigation and eating MREs (Meals Ready to Eat). A friend once described this lifestyle as having "multiple hats." She explained it as you have a hat for each different part of your life. For example, my main difference is my ROTC and sorority hat.

ROTC stands for Reserve Officer Training Corps. In the short term, this means that I am training to be an Officer in the United States Army. When I graduate college, I will then start my career in the Army. The way I present my "ROTC hat" now is going to determine my career later on. My hat shows me I have to be motivated and strict. My obligations include dedicating my mornings, class time, and extra volunteer hours to ROTC. Being up at 5 a.m. three days a week and taking 21 credit hours my second semester of college is a perfect example of why I have to stay motivated and strict on my self.

Being in a sorority, however, is the perfect breath of fresh air that helps me stay sane. It is a support system and friendship. My sorority helps me realize that college is supposed to be a fun life experience, not just a step in life. My "sorority hat" is carefree and fun. Although I am very busy with my other obligations, my sorority makes it easy to stay involved with date parties and philanthropy events.

In my position, I have been very overwhelmed trying to be successful with every hat I put on. Coming into college, I was very skeptical about sorority recruitment because I was worried about not being able to juggle it all. I am here now finishing up my freshman year of college, so thankful I pushed myself to be completely submerged in involvement. Being as involved as I am has helped me gain best friends as well as great memories.

I have been pushed to the limit these past two semesters, but it shows me what I am capable of. Finishing my freshman year, I am more confident in myself and what I want in life. Having these obligations has helped me develop time management skills. With the help of my two hats, I stay level headed and they have helped me realize that I can be who I want to be. Just because I am in ROTC does not mean I have to fit in a cookie cutter shape of being a cadet, just like being in a sorority does not mean I am a reflection of the stereotype of sorority girls. Just in my first year of college, I have already learned so much from both of these organizations and they have helped me develop into who I am today.

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