First of all, it’s not easy -- but relationships, in general, aren’t easy. You’re damn lucky if you’re out of the honeymoon stage, and your relationship is all smiles and cuddles. In reality though, 90 percent of the time, that’s not how relationships work.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for four and a half years. We’ve known each other since third grade so we’ve seen each other face the highs and lows life throws at you. Even the awkward middle school years so if that’s not true love, I don’t know what is. But as much as I love my relationship, being opposites hasn’t always been easy, and it probably never will be.
For one, it takes us an hour to decide on anything. This includes where to eat, what to eat, or even if we should eat out or stay in. How about what music to play on the radio? That’s another 10 minutes wasted on hitting the “skip” button from 87.9 to 107.9. Eventually, no music is usually the end result.
It may seem like we have nothing in common, and it’s true that we have very little in common, but the problem is mainly that we’re never in the mood for the same things at the same time. For example, we both love chicken wings. Granted, he likes traditional wings and I like boneless but, nonetheless, we can agree on eating chicken. However, I’ll be like, “I’m in the mood for Buffalo Wild Wings,” and I swear just because I’m in the mood for BWW, he’ll be in the mood for Chinese take-out. Seriously, this is a daily struggle.
Comparing my boyfriend and me is like apples versus oranges. I love fall and spring, he loves summer and winter. I like sunshine and he likes rain. I prefer country or pop music and he prefers hip-hop and rap. Despite all these differences, we’ve come to appreciate each other’s likes and dislikes.
There are important lessons learned when dating your opposite. Throughout the years, I’ve become more understanding and open-minded. While sometimes it’s hard to see the other person’s perspective, over time I’ve come to embrace my boyfriend’s opinions and he’s done the same. This has also improved our communication skills, which is key to every healthy relationship.
I’d like to think I’m a positive person, and even though it’s hard for him to admit, my boyfriend knows he’s more negative. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Our personalities may be different, but I know I can cheer him up and motivate him, and he’s able to keep me calm and realistic. Lastly, dating your opposite leads to discovering new things. I was never into following sports, but I try to show some interest because it’s important to my boyfriend. But, along the way, I’ve realized I actually enjoy learning about how the game works and sitting down to watch them with him. While my boyfriend claims he doesn’t like romance movies or drama TV shows, he still willingly watches them with me (and from what I see, he isn’t miserable).
This is my personal experience dating my polar opposite, but I believe it’s good for everyone to experience. My boyfriend and I make it work because we love each other. Sometimes these differences test our relationship, but it ultimately makes us stronger. All relationships require compromise and effort, and even if mine requires a little bit more; I still wouldn’t change a thing.
