Girls, Give Your Guy Best Friend A Shot At The Real Thing
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Girls, Give Your Guy Best Friend A Shot At The Real Thing

Why was I looking for somebody to make my world go 'round when he was right there all along?

Girls, Give Your Guy Best Friend A Shot At The Real Thing
Abby Engel

In 2015, I met this kid in my math class with earrings and a Neff hat.

I found him online and messaged him, and I know what you're thinking, but that's not it.

I was just dumped on my birthday, I was heartbroken, and I just wanted to know if we could use a calculator on our exam the next day because I missed our class before. I wasn't looking for anything else. But then I sat by him in class, and we got to talking. Next thing I knew, I invited him to work a music festival with me and surprisingly, he said yes.

And then, I was sharing a tent with a kid I met in math class at Electric Forest.

Before I knew it, I was inviting him to weddings, and parties, to spend the weekend with me, on trips, calling him when I got into a fight with somebody and tagging him in funny things online.

He's the type of person that makes you laugh with tears streaming down your face, always has the best song ready to go when you hand him the aux chord, will say "I don't care where we go to eat" and actually mean it because he doesn't actually care. He's the type of person that dropped everything to be my shoulder to cry on, that knew what he wanted, always knew how to treat me with respect and always was down for any crazy, stupid adventure I came up with.

And this is the part where you want me to tell you that we fell in love. Right?

Well, no. I started dating somebody else.

And my male best friend still came around, he went places with me and my boyfriend. I even wrote an article about how much his friendship meant to me. And I convinced myself that he was just my best friend, and still called him when I had nobody else, when I needed help, when I needed to talk, when I wanted him to come to a party with us. He was the face I looked for in the crowd, he was the one I didn't have fun without.

And I should have known all along that I was in love with him.

But it wasn't until this last year that it hit me like a freight train: Why was I looking for somebody to make my world go 'round when he was right there all along?

Why did I put such an amazing man in the friend zone (don't lie, it exists)? Why do we take the nice guys, the ones that look at us like we are the prettiest people in the room, the ones that would jump off a bridge if it meant they could see us smile, and put them in the corner? Why do we not give the boys that care about us and love us the way we want to be loved a chance?

Is it because they're raised differently? Or because we like to try and take shallow boys and make them men? Is it because we fear a real man and would rather take somebody who treats us poorly?

I honestly don't know why I didn't date him sooner, but I do know that I regret it.

Because this man makes me feel like I'm worth the world. He showers me in kisses, he drives because he knows I hate it, he lets me ride on the front of the cart at the grocery store like a child, he makes me soup and plays with my hair when I'm sick, he makes me laugh until I cry, and he reminds me every day that he loves me. Guys, he even does the dishes.

He makes me feel the way I always wanted to feel, and I think that some part of me always knew that he was the one, I just didn't quite understand it.

So here's my point:

Girls -- Stop looking for somebody that will treat you the way you want to be treated and throwing the men in your life that already treat you that way (aka your best guy friend) in the corner. I promise he's worth the shot. Find your Dakota, and leave the shallow boys behind.

Guys -- Don't be shallow, and tell her you're in love with her.

Wait until she realizes you're everything she's ever wanted if you have to. I promise it will always happen. After all, Dakota told me, "I'll always be here."

Dakota -- Thank you for waiting three years for me. I hope I was worth the wait, I hope I make you as happy as you make me, and I'm so glad that you will forever be my partner in every adventure I take.

Now, love is worth the dive. Why not dive in with your best friend? I promise the water's just fine.

I hope you all find your Dakota.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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