We all watched and loved Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide when we were younger. The protagonists Ned, Cookie, and Moze actually gave us some great tips about...
1. Avoidable haircuts.
2. Our first awkward relationships.
3. And of course, passing gas in school.
But somehow we grew up, and still have unanswered questions about life, especially the meant to be fun but actually huge struggle of date functions.
So how do we survive them? Let's entertain the idea that this actually could happen...
1. Remember the date of the event.
We've all had that moment when you realize your date function is in less than two short weeks, the date list was already kind of due, and you are without a trendy...but not too try hard outfit.
2. Have a date that kind of likes you. (FYI your dog/significant pet other is always free!)
He doesn't have to be Prince Charming, but if he can hold a semi-delightful conversation you should be good.
3. Wear something you feel flawless in, because you deserve it.
I have to admit it kind of feels good to put my bummy clothes away for once and look pretty dang good. If Katniss did it, so can you!
4. Know the GPS coordinates of the picture's location...because missing pictures really bites you in the Instagram butt.
I mean scrolling through all the group pictures without you could really get you down the next day.
5. Feel accomplished when you find it.
Have an overly excited Elle Woods moment. Maybe even throw in a high five!
6. And be prepared for the 5 seconds everyone checks you out when you walk in...
Or just stand there awkwardly because that works too.
7. Take a quality picture.
or a hundred...
8. Pace yourself with drinks.
9. When you get to the venue, keep it together.
10. Always scope out the food situation.
11. Be prepared for long bathroom line socialization.
12. Pray for the function chair. She needs to remain strong.
13. On the way home, stay clear of routes that pass by fast food. You know why.
14. When you get home, congratulate yourself.
15. Lastly, don't push yourself too much the next day.
And with that, happy function season! I give you my best of luck, and may the function Gods be with you.
