Living through your child is a phenomenon that has swept the dance world. As a dancer, I have witnessed this different world of being concerned with winning first place.
If you have seen the globalized reality TV show “Dance Moms” with crazed teacher Abby Lee Miller and the equally crazed mothers of the children, you know what I’m talking about. To be honest, I watch it fairly often. However, I usually skip over the parts where the moms are pathetically fighting over which child should’ve gotten the weekly solo, putting other kids down for being better dancers.
Being a dance mom can be great for those who are supportive and who stand up for their kid in order to get the best opportunities available. However, there is a fine line between being supportive and being borderline nuts about who’s kid is the best. In the show “Dance Moms” that started in 2011, the show began with the two favorites: Maddie Ziegler and Chloe Lukasiak. Eventually, Chloe left and Maddie went on to tour professionally with artist Sia. Most people know exactly who those girls are and wouldn’t be as widely-known if it wasn’t for the show. Nonetheless, every episode both moms would fight because they wanted their kid to be the most famous, the most successful. Don’t get me wrong, being a supportive mother is great, but most of these moms (on this show and in real life) spend every minute at the dance studio and at competitions all around the country, all wearing t-shirts reading their studio, their child’s name, and a cutesy phrase for how they’re going to win.
How do I know this? As I said I’ve watched a good amount of “Dance Moms”, but I’ve also gone to a few competitions as well. I’m not a huge competition dancer, but as I went to one this past weekend in Atlanta, I again noticed the dance mothers. Some were yelling at their kids to get dressed and head to the stage, I saw one who was talking very forcefully to her teenage daughter about how she messed up onstage. Here’s the thing: competition dancing has become just that- a competition to see who will come out on top; girls and boys who dance 25-30 hours a week to get that first place overall trophy. The issue I have with that is the lack of emotion. Of course, older kids usually are only dancing that often because they really want to, but watching teachers yelling at their students to point their big toe and, “Technique is everything!” made me realize how much of the emotion isn’t always genuine on stage.
I like to dance because I can emote passion and try my very hardest to make the audience feel something. When I watched 50 or so numbers compete yesterday, maybe 10 or 20 of them made me feel excited, elated or tugged at my heartstrings.
Maybe this article isn’t so much about dance moms as it is going back to the roots of dancing- technique and sentiment. Technique is always, always important, but emoting to the point where someone in the audience empathizes with you is even more indispensable.
