There’s an endless supply of crazy soccer moms, basketball dads, dance moms, the list goes on and on. I believe that there is also such a thing as a crazy dog parent. This title belongs to those who revolve every aspect of their life around their dog, as if they are obsessive parents to these four-legged kiddos. Here is a brief look into the life of a fellow crazy dog mom.
Including them in EVERY family photo.
Because nothing adds an extra ounce of holiday spirit to your yearly Christmas card quite like a dog in a Santa hat as the focal point. Dogs are the family members you get to choose, so why not show off how proud you are to have a relative that is also your best friend?
Repeating everything at least ten times when addressing them, each time increasing in excitement.
I am certain that it is nearly impossible to sufficiently convey your undying affection to them without saying, “I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!” Dogs are very smart animals, so they probably understand the first three times you mention something, but I think this is just our way of trying to feed off of their excitement.
Jumping at the chance to chime in and talk about or show pictures of your “children.”
Tip: setting their picture as your phone background can come in handy. Your friends should be able to guess that if your Facebook post is longer than two words, it is most likely another dog story. If you notice people rolling their eyes when you start in with, “One time Buster and I…” you are doing it right!
Not talking through them, but talking as them.
This can involve having a certain voice for your dog of how you imagine they would speak if they were able to. If you are like me and have multiple dogs, you may even have a different voice for each one. For example, when I am speaking as one of my dogs, I have a Russian accent just because if some day he surprises me and starts literally telling me what he wants, I envision this tone coming from his adorable doggy mouth. Another one of my dogs (I have four) has the personality of a spoiled princess, so when I am trying to voice what I imagine she is thinking, I talk as if I am the Queen of England.
The tragic struggle of watching them sleep like an angel and secretly wanting to ruin it by cuddling with them.
Just when you think you cannot possibly have any more love for your dog child, they fall asleep. This is not just any sleep like that of a human. Once they shut those big brown eyes, it’s game over. Adoration overload.
Being late to everything because you took so long saying goodbye.
“Sorry I’m late guys, Luna had that look on her face again. I couldn’t just leave without explaining where I’m going and when I’ll be back. Then I had to give her a proper goodbye and a treat to cheer her up.”
“…You’re two hours late, dude.”
