We were never really friends - there was always something more, and we both knew that. We've known each other for a while now, and you slowly gained my trust. We were constantly flirting and being cute, but I held back cause I thought it would never work. But you continued to pursue me, and I would always keep my distance. Until recently when I let my guard down.
It all happened pretty fast, but we went for it. We knew this would only be temporary, but we made promises to each other. Promising to always treat each other fairly and always be there for the other. We agreed to live in the moment and cherish every day we had together. We spent all the time we could together and it the little things that seemed to matter. We just wanted to be with each other and that was what important.
I truly thought we were happy, but maybe I was wrong. In a matter of days, everything changed, and I really didn't see it coming. I could tell something was up, but I wasn't sure what had happened. One day you were telling me how happy you were and the next you were ignoring me. Pushing me away with no explanation. You no longer looked at me in the same way, and that broke me. Instead of dealing with your emotions you just ran and put up a wall. When I tried to be there for you wouldn't let me in. The part I don't understand is you always said you didn't want me to overthink and be stress.
But then you let me blame myself for your problems. You couldn't even end it properly. I was the one who had to ask what was going on and what changed. You just send a simple text to end it saying you were falling too hard and that feelings were liabilities. You couldn't deal with it, so you let me break. You made it very clear that you needed me in your life but just as a friend. Now you can't understand why it's hard for me to just see you as a friend. We don't even know how to be friends, and I need time to still heal.
The truth is maybe I should have seen the red flags, but I was too transfixed on what I thought we had. But you were the one who could never be honest and still isn't honest. I want to believe you but I just can't anymore. I still sometimes wonder the real the reason it ended, but I've accepted the fact that you will never be open enough to let me know. Even though it still hurts sometimes, I've become a stronger person from all of this. I've gained more strength than you can even imagine and I'm done blaming myself for your insecurities.
