Coronavirus Cut My College Years Short, And It's My Worst Breakup
Start writing a post

Coronavirus Cut My College Years Short, And It's More Heartbreaking Than My Worst Breakup

I know it's for the best, but I'm still so sad.

Coronavirus Cut My College Years Short, And It's More Heartbreaking Than My Worst Breakup

You know that feeling you get when your heart is broken and you know you have to be cordial, but you just don't want to?

There's a pit in your stomach that feels like it will never go away even though you know it eventually will. You know it will get better in time but that time seems like an eternity.

Well, that's exactly how I feel and have felt since I had to end my senior year at the University of Kentucky far too soon.

The thing is, I know that leaving early was for the best — just like when you break up with someone and, even though it sucks, you know it is for the best. For you and for everyone around you. But, it still doesn't take away from the fact that it's still a hard pill to swallow.

I'm the type of person who loves to plan things and look far into the future, and having those future plans taken away is still hard.

It's like breaking up with someone before you got to go to that concert you two were looking forward to or celebrate the birthday or anniversary coming up together. During this time of social distancing, it was my last date party and last formal. It was the last mom's weekend that I would spend with my mom, my best friend, and her mom. It was those last Thursday nights out with my group of girlfriends. It was study dates in coffee shops around Lexington. It was graduation and being able to take graduation photos in front of Willy T with my friends in our cap and gowns.

You know that "boss-up" mode you go into when you feel like you're over the sadness?

You turn on some badass music and drink some more coffee and deal with it. But, deep down you're mad as all get-out and feel like you could break any moment. Sound familiar? I feel this way about getting only 3.5 years of college. Just last night I cried right after I felt like I could take on this awful thing that seems like it's taking over the world.

I feel like the only thing I can do right now is turn on some Beyonce and drink my iced coffee in the morning and make the most of this situation that we're all in.

I feel jealous for the class behind us who will hopefully get all those "lasts." The type of jealousy you get when you know that eventually, that other person will move on from you with someone better. That gut-wrenching feeling that just makes you want to stay in bed all day and cry and listen to sad songs and do absolutely nothing.

I feel sad, genuinely sad, that I can't get those last moments with my college best friends that I've mostly been through all of these past 3.5 years with.

But, despite all these negative feelings, I still feel happy that next year's seniors get to experience these sweet moments. It's hard to feel happy for the next person who gets to spend time with someone who used to be a big part of your life, but knowing that your ex-significant other gave you happy times can make the breakup seem more bearable.

Breakups get easier with time, and then you'll realize all the good things that have come out of it.

There will still be times of sadness and anger and jealousy, but it won't last forever. It's OK to feel however you're feeling. It's OK to be upset and mad that you got time and memories taken away from you. You have to make the most out of the situation you're in and realize that this is for the best.

Whether it's a breakup or social distancing, you'll be able to see the good that comes out of it eventually.

At least (and the most important thing to remember) we're all in this together and we don't have to go through this weird, confusing, upsetting time alone.

Follow Swoon on Instagram.

Report this Content
Olivia White

"The American flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies from the last breath of each solider who died protecting it."

Keep Reading... Show less

Separation Anxiety in Pets

Separation anxiety in pets is a real thing and recognizing the warning signs is important.


Since March, Covid-19 required most of the world to quarantine in their homes. Majority of people ended up working from home for nearly five months. This meant pet owners were constantly with their pets giving them attention, playing with them, letting them out etc. Therefore, when the world slowly started to open up again and pet owners began returning to normal life work schedules away from the home, pet owners noticed a difference in the way their pet acted. Many pets develop separation anxiety especially during this crazy time when majority people were stuck inside barely leaving the house.

Keep Reading... Show less
Robert Bye on Unsplash

I live by New York City and I am so excited for all of the summer adventures.

Keep Reading... Show less

The invention of photography

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.


The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers


Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series


Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments