Growing up in a Southern Baptist household is never easy, especially when you’re trying to discover yourself as an individual. As a teenager/early adult, you seek to find yourself as well as to seek acceptance from your peers, or in this case, your parents. Growing up, I was taught to be a God-fearing, good little Southern Belle. However, that’s not who I really was. As a teenager, I luckily had multiple groups of friends from different cliques in high school. I was the typical goth kid with the crazy colored hair, black baggy chain pants, dark makeup and sometimes even sporting a fox tail.
It wasn’t until I graduated high school and started college that I started to realize that there is so much more to life than what my parents had taught me. There were events and opportunities that were presented to me that made me open my eyes to other countercultures that I had never imagined, but with that, I began to question myself. Between all the people I dated, most of whom were abusive, there was always a constant internal conflict of what I wanted out of my life. I didn’t agree with the typical Christian beliefs that my parents had drilled into my head, and quite frankly, I resented myself for it. I tried experimenting in different religions but I could never open up to my family about it and it killed me inside.
There was nothing I wanted more than my mother’s approval and it wasn’t until the meeting of my husband, constant nights of crying over it and trying to explain my side of the story to her, did I realize that this life is for me. Yes, while it would be amazing to have her approval on my current Wiccan lifestyle, it’s not going to happen. There was one instance in which my husband called my mother in an attempt to try to settle the argument, and she said — word for word— “if it’s not for God, it’s for the devil. Simple as that”. It crushed me inside, but it was what I needed to hear. Hearing that phrase coming from my mother’s mouth was the validation that I needed to start living my life regardless of my mother’s religious views
The Wiccan religion is very peaceful; “tree huggers that wear black” is what I like to say. As long as one person isn’t doing harm to another, it shouldn’t be an issue. My advice to anyone who is struggling with this issue, no matter age, race, sexuality, or background is to just find yourself. Make peace with your family if need be, don’t be so quick to shut your family out because you think they don’t understand. In some cases, if your family is abusive, by all means, get out of the situation. That is a burden that you do not need to bare. Find yourself. Love yourself. Make peace with your family, and don’t be quick to act rash. This is never an easy situation, but just keep your cool and keep true to yourself.
