Confidence. You can’t see it, touch it, or measure it. But, nevertheless, the quality itself has observable manifestations both in ourselves and the people we surround ourselves with. We intuitively know who has it and who doesn’t.
Confidence is like the rain. Sometimes we are drenched, such as the time when we got the hot hand in basketball or boldly approached that attractive girl across the room. Other times, our confidence is no where to be found. Where did it go, and how do we get it back?
Below are 10 signs, or manifestations, of a confident person. As you read them, think to yourself of how they are showing up, or the lack there of, in your thoughts, conversations, and attitudes with and towards other people.
Here are the 10 signs that YOU have that indispensable and ephemeral quality.
1. You don’t feel the need to impress others.
You let them, if they are so inclined, try and impress you.
2. You compliment others, authentically, with no interest of getting one in return.
3. You share the glory.
If someone has a great idea, you don’t claim it as your own. You know you’ll contribute great ideas at some point, if you haven’t already.
4. You pull people up.
If someone takes a risk (say writing a book, starting a youtube channel, or giving a speech) you are supportive of the effort and give constructive criticism when needed. Anybody can jeer; that’s why most do. As Teddy Roosevelt remarked, “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.”
5. In fact, you are the one in the arena.
You understand that, to be liked by everyone, you will be loved by no one. You dare to be different. No one applauds the chameleon; in fact, no one even sees it.
6. You don’t suffer from paralysis by analysis.
As Tony Robbins once said, “If you stay in your head, you’re dead.” This doesn’t mean you make stupid, rash, and impulsive decisions, it means you act before you let the inner demons stop you from doing something you intuitively know you should. There are courageous lions and bashful sheep. You know which one you are.
7. You’re an intelligent person.
The smarter you become, the more confident you become. With a better understanding of the world around you, you don’t live in fear, you live with conviction.
8. You work hard.
Very few people can obtain a high degree of confidence without the necessary preparation. You don’t understand that one doesn’t rise to they occasion, they fall to their own level of preparation.
9. You are results driven.
Success yields confidence. You set goals, you accomplish those goals, and you gain confidence. Rinse and Repeat.
10. You are self aware, but not insecure.
Those who are delusional with respect to their own view of themselves are usually off putting and deemed full of themselves. You are aware of how you come off to others, but not overly stressed about it. It’s a balance beam, and you can do cartwheels on it.
