Our public schools are in danger, America. Our families are in danger. Our mental health is in danger. The threat? The competition present in our US public schools. Each day, I am saddened more and more as I hear stories of kids ending their lives. Kids with all A's in their 7 AP classes. Kids on the track team. Kids who seem like they have it all together. I remember the pressure I felt, especially in high school. The stress of doing well and getting into college and achieving perfection sent me into a downward spiral. I believed my identity rested in my grades, and when they started to waiver, so did my sense of self.

We use this word in my school district, "realistic rigor", which means challenging yourself in a realistic way, but no one is going to fall through with that when they believe that they need to be the best and come out on top. I believe that our schools are too individualistic. We pride ourselves in our high test scores and undefeated sports teams, but where is the school spirit? I wouldn't even begin to identify my high school as a family; they were more like my competitors. There was no sense of unity of pride; in fact, quite the opposite was true. I never felt more alone than in high school.

A plethora of people are affected by this pattern, but there is a particular group I want to point out: trauma kids. In my family, we have three adoptive brothers, two of which have faced severe trauma. This trauma manifests itself in a range of issues, one being paying attention. My nine-year-old brother has severe ADHD (bless his heart) and his trauma impacts his motor skills, ability to pay attention, and self-regulation. My sweet brother loves football, so he joined the school team this past year. I went to the last game of the season, hoping to see my brother run onto the field and kick some butt. But to my disdain, he never got put on the field. The entire game. Except for one play he ran on the field and the coaches were yelling at him to get off. I heard from my parents that he had only been on the field a couple of times the whole season.

I know he can't pay attention or follow directions very well, and he certainly cannot memorize intricate plays. But the reason he was hardly put in the game was that he wasn't good enough? It's fourth grade football! This is the age where children should be trying things and figuring out what they love! They should be learning how to play the game! I am concerned that this type of decision is damaging kids' self-esteem at an impressionable age. It's ridiculous that they would keep an enthusiastic kid off the field to simply win. This doesn't exemplify camaraderie to me, at all. It screams self-interest and individualism, and a kid with severe trauma will never be able to do this journey alone! This manifests itself in social and academic settings. Some children will never be able to keep up; in fact, they will drown trying and become resentful towards learning.

I want to see schools breaking apart this leitmotif. We should be witnessing community building and appreciate the diversity around us. We should be learning how to be more empathetic towards people who are talented in different areas. We should be teaching students how to love learning. We should be supported foster and adoptive families who feel disheartened. Imagine if we could encourage all children to strive for whatever they want, and help make that happen. I think together, we could overcome the learned-helplessness that comes from attending a cutthroat school.