I have always been too idealistic, too opinionated, and too tender. Maybe I owe these characteristics to my astrological origins. The two women in my life -- Virgo, virginal woman; Pervasive and analytical, I am the meticulous beauty the universe has kept tucked away for centuries. Amid my stolidity, I am more wave than woman. Piscean treasure. More abstract painting than concrete creation -- I am a contradiction.
Astrology, Myers Briggs, Enneagram tests -- I find comfort in it all. I am in love with the idea of understanding myself. Often, I find myself being given very little time to do so. Shoved from year to year. A new milestone comes and goes, serving as a reminder of how dearly I would love for time to slow down. If only for a moment, so I may catch my breath and run alongside.
I often wonder why I long to compartmentalize myself. In truth, I am not easily definable. I am a leader, with a heart for the insignificant. I lack the harshness to lead with an iron fist, yet I impose perfectionistic tendencies upon myself. Perhaps it makes sense that instilled within my desire for academic knowledge is a desire to better know myself.
According to Myers Briggs I am an ENFJ. I had never understood myself more than in the moment I became categorized by four letters. I have found solace behind its title as "The Protagonist." Many feel trapped by labels, yet for me, they provide a sense of freedom. I have found that in having a better understanding of myself, I gain a better understanding of those around me. When offered the 4 letter code of a friend, my mind thumbs through a menagerie of files- giving me instant insight into their life.
Categorization has always put me at ease. Whether I chose to rely upon Keirsey Temperaments, Socionics, or even the fictional Sorting Hat of Harry Potter; I have found comfort in definition. When we are given an insider’s look at the mind of our neighbor, we are given a glimpse at the beauty held within the eye of the beholder. As we learn to understand each other, we take a step towards progression into a more just society. Whether you believe in the value of astrology and cognitive functions or not, we can all gain something by choosing to see things from others’ perspectives.
