I wish I knew this before I spent 3 years and over 80 grand on school but it takes time to realize is what I got told.

I'm currently a junior but considered a freshman/sophomore because I transferred and didn't have enough of my major requirements to be considered a junior. I also switched majors while transferring which set me back a bit too. Thats not why I decided it was time for a break from school. I decided when I realized I still had another two or three years left of just my undergraduate and my health, mental, physical and emotional, was the worst its ever been and my grades reflected my health as well.

Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't one for school most of my 20 years of living but I did it because I wanted to get an education to get a decent paying job and to please my parents. Even though I wasn't one for school, I still tried my hardest, did the work and always studied but that wasn't enough. My grades didn't reflect the work I would put into some of my classes. Finals week of this semester is when I realized, its time to probably take a break.

I was in my apartment all alone when I started to have a mental breakdown, now if you're in college you know mental breakdowns happen, but this one was different. It was different in the aspect that I realized my mental and physical health was the worst its ever been. I started to think about the past three years of college and realized that each year I became more depressed and gained more weight. So I drove to my parents which was 20 minutes away and had my mental breakdown to them. I didn't know what to expect from them because a week ago I made the decision to join ROTC and I seemed the happiest Ive been in a while.

Lets just say my parents were completely understanding and helped me make the decision to take a break from school. I saw disappointment but I also felt it in myself because I had such big dreams and I felt like I was just throwing them away (along with the money I spent). I wasn't though, I just had to figure out another way to fill those dreams. My parents definitely helped me understand and feel better about not finishing my degree right now.

Its okay not to go to college, not finish, or even take a break for a bit because at the end of the day, your health is the most important thing. So we'll see where life takes me but for now I'm closing my college chapter, maybe to reopen later on but I'll wait to see.