The Chronology Of FOMO

How does it begin? How does it end?

Feb 08, 2016

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There is so much going on tonight. The amount of bars that are serving $2 tequila shots and the amount of frats that are having parties are overwhelming. Your group chat is blowing up with the usual, “What do I wear?” and, “What time should we PG?” questions. It’s Thursday and you haven’t been out in a whopping four days. This is the perfect opportunity to have a good time.

Unfortunately, you have hours of history homework to finish, an English essay that's due on Monday, and a calculus exam tomorrow. Plus, you think that you destroyed your immune system by going out Thursday night, partying Friday, going out Friday night, partying Saturday, and going out again on Saturday night of last week. (Did you follow that?) Seriously, when will your stuffy nose go away? Anyway, you know that you shouldn’t go out. So, as a responsible young adult and college student, you stay in. Cue the FOMO.

What is FOMO, you ask? It's the fear of missing out. Similar to the common fears of spiders or the dark, FOMO is very real. What happens if you miss out on the best party of the year? What if something monumental happens and you’re not there to witness it? Staying in when your friends are going out is a real struggle. In order to truly understand FOMO, though, you have to break it down. So, I will give you an example of the chronology of this deadly condition (for your own benefit and entertainment, of course).

Monday

You receive your social schedule for the week via email. It's a killer line-up and you promise yourself that you won't miss anything.

Tuesday

You plan your outfit for the "Hunt or Be Hunted" themed mixer on Thursday. You're going to look so cute in that safari hat.

Wednesday

Your calc teacher reminds the class about the test on Friday (the one that you totally forgot about).

Wednesday Night

You try to study for calculus so that you can go out on Thursday night. However, you're still completely screwed for the test.

Thursday Afternoon

Your group chat is popping. Everyone is so excited for tonight! You know that it's not looking good for you, though. Each message is like a stab in the heart.

Thursday Night

You make the official decision to stay in and get your schoolwork done, even though you desperately want to go out. You text your friends, "Have fun tonight!" You feel like a bigger person and you're satisfied with yourself.

Then you look on Snapchat.

So you constantly refresh your Snapchat stories just to torture yourself.

Friday Morning

You look at the pictures that were posted on Facebook and you listen to your friends' stories about the night.

You're sad that you missed out on a great night, but your friends tell you that it wasn't the same without you.

The FOMO was a struggle, but you've realized that it's not the end of the world. I'm just kidding, it's not the end of the week.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The Chronology Of FOMO

How does it begin? How does it end?

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Wednesday Night

Thursday Afternoon

Thursday Night

Friday Morning

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You can be yourself without having to explain yourself, because she accepts you and loves you just the way you are.

The temperature may not be very Autumn-like, but these playlists sure are.

1. Southern Gothic

2. Autumn Acoustics

3. Autumn Leaves

4. Deep Dark Indie

5. Dreamy Fall

6. Halloween Hipster

7. Wanderlust

8. Your Favorite Coffeehouse

... Because life happens

1. Realizing there's no more toilet paper when it's already too late.

2. Making a cup of coffee in the morning and forgetting it in the car.

3. Pushing doors that say pull.

4. When you hear people chew.

5. When it's really quiet in a room and you hear that one person breathing like they just ran a marathon.

6. Grabbing a chocolate chip cookie, only to realize it's actually oatmeal raisin.

7. Getting comfortable in bed and then realizing you forgot to pee/turn off the light.

8. That one aunt/uncle that just always gives you that creepy vibe.

9. When your teacher makes you buy a textbook that you never even crack open.

10. Continuing to open and reopen the fridge until the food that you want magically makes its way in there.

11. Walking into a room and then automatically forgetting why you went in there.

12. People that drive without using their blinker.

13. When you have really slow wi-fi.

14. People who feel the need to scream into their phones as if the other person can't hear them.

15. The world's obsession with the Kardashian/Jenner families.

16. Advertisements before Youtube videos.

17. When people read over your shoulder.

18. A-holes that park in the handicapped spots when they, in fact, not handicapped.

19. People who cut in line.

20. The LIRR/MTA

21. Being stuck behind someone who is walking painfully slow.

22. When people smoke cigarettes right in front of the entrance to the building you have to walk into.

23. When boys think it's cool to treat girls like crap.

24. Guys that still go to high school parties even though they've been out of high school for years.

25. Celebrities that are obviously lip-syncing.

26. How you need a scissor to get the scissor out of its package.

27. When people text using that stupid "voice text" function.

28. Telling someone you can't hear them, so they use the same exact volume and just repeat what they said.

29. When someone gets in the shower right as you were about to get in the shower.

30. Saying "What?" for some reason, even though you heard what the person said.

31. When you're in a rush but the light is red.

32. Cashiers putting your change down on the counter instead of in your hand.

33. The people that go up to order food to the cashier but are still continuing their phone conversation.

34. That awkward time in the fall when it's freezing in the morning but stifling in the afternoon.

35. Emailing your professor a long winded paragraph about a problem you are having and they email back, "Sure."

36. Guys who put their car as their profile picture on Facebook.

37. Girls who have "X Years Young." in their Instagram bios.

38. Trying to find the beginning to a roll of tape.

39. When people drive your car and adjust your mirrors/seat.

40. People that talk during the movie.

41. People that decide to engage in conversation right in the middle of the hallway/sidewalk.

42. When someone says, "no offense," and then continues to say something offensive.

43. People that pop their significant others pimples.

44. Teacher's pets.

45. Going to the bathroom and someone goes into the stall right next to you.

46. When someone leaves your room and doesn't shut the door.

47. Political debates between two people who know nothing about politics.

48. When you get all ready to go out and your friend cancels plans.

49. People that drop their friends for their significant other.

50. People that don't like animals.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

Things to do in October.

1. Going to haunted houses with friends.

2. Going to Halloween parties with friends or families or both.

3. We all enjoy going to apple orchards to pick apples and to eat donuts with apple cider.

4. When you are younger or through high school, you go trick or treating in various of costumes going door to door saying "trick or treat" and you get candy or whatever they are giving you for Halloween.

5. Another fun part of October is to go to corn mazes which are sometimes fun and hard to do with friends and family.

6. Back in elementary school, we had Halloween Parties where homeroom parents were the ones who planned them for Halloween.

7. Another event that happens during the month of October is Halloween Nights at the Henry Ford in the evenings.

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