Can I Touch It?....No.

I don't know why many people feel the need to touch the monster. IT ONLY ANGERS IT! Leave my hair alone and it won't poof up into a giant ball.

Blow Drying

You can't simply blow dry curly hair. Ha, no. No, no, no. It's not that simple. See we first need a special diffuser attachment for the blow dryer. Which then you wait an hour blow-drying your hair because of your hair so thiccck (Yes, with three Cs). By the time you are finished blow drying your hair will fully dry to add product into. Then by the end of all this lovely time, you are good to go to bed because it's night time by the time you finish.

I Want This Look Buttt.. Pooffff!

A new hair cut can be really exciting for anyone. Yet, curly haired people have to be careful. Like reallllly careful. You could end up with the most amazing haircut where people stare in awe as you walk by orrr you could end up looking like Larry from The Three Stooges. There is no middle ground.

Brush! HA!

YOU NEVER! EVER! BRUSH CURLY HAIR! No matter how tangled it might be, you always have to wait till you go into the shower. It will always end in disaster. I don't know about you but I don't like looking like Princess Mia from the Princess Diaries in the very beginning. I can take the ending part however 😉

Oh It's Getting Hot Hot Hot, But My Hair Is Not Not Not

Hot weather will be the death of me and my hair. Looking at the weather and seeing it's supposed to be humid will help me decide if I shall be social or not that day. Not humid I'll adventure out into the world. If it's humid I will cower in the corner of my air-conditioned room and hiss at the heat waves.

Mushroom Head

Hats look, feel, and are amazing. Yet, not when you have curly hair. Wearing a beanie looks cool and stylish until you take it off and you look like a hybrid of coconut head and a mop dog.

Can You Help Me?... My Comb Is Stuck

I know this sounds weird and might be a little gross, but things constantly get stuck. Like bugs. Yes, bugs. It will always amaze me to find hair clips in my hair that I wore in fifth grade. It's like an amazing game of needle in the haystack. Well, if that needle was a hair clip, a piece of paper, a comb, ruler, crayons, books, etc, etc, etc.

Bed Head x2

If a curly haired person does not have a silk pillowcase you are already screwed. Be prepared to wake up with one side flat as garlic bread and the other filled with mountainous curls.

Soooo Many Products

First, you need to shampoo your hair just a little bit to get rid of the junk out. Second, you need to condition that monster until it calms the f**k down. Third, you need to then have an additional conditioner to put to make sure it's nice moisturized. Fourth, you need to add anti-frizz crap to make sure you don't completely die in the humidity. Fifth, blow dry or microfiber dry your hair. Six, style the heck out of your hair in any shape or form with about 3-6 different products. Finally, you should be able to exit throughout your door. You enter out into the unknown world and when you look into the mirror next you will realize all the work you've done just went *POOF*.