The term "half brother" is one that has always confused and irked me. I have always been close to my older brothers (notice the term) even though we have different fathers. Does that matter? No. Are they less of a brother, less of a role model or are required to show less affection to their little sister? No. My two older brothers have always been there. They gave me my first teddy bear (which I still have) on the day I was born. They laughed as my sister and I followed them around and walked around the house in our diapers. They sat on the couch watching TV with us on their laps and yes, they still yelled when their little sister ventured into their rooms. My brothers are about 14 years older than I am, but that doesn't mean that they didn't grow up with me, or that they had any less influence on my life.
I despise the awkward situation that occurs when you are in conversations with someone and they ask you about your siblings. I always tell them I have 3; two older brothers that are 30 and 31 as well as a little sister. This conversation usually takes place locally and the person I am speaking with knows of my little sister and my parents. They ALWAYS reply with the same message, "I didn't know you had older brothers!? Are they your fathers'?" I know that whomever I was talking to is not deliberately trying to be rude, they are just trying to fit all the pieces together; however, this doesn't make it any less aggravating. I always want to answer with "No, technically their not my father's biological children, but we grew up together and my father is just as much their as he is mine." If I responded in this way, I would be seen as rude and I am not trying to hurt anyone's feelings. I usually just respond with "Oh.... their my half brothers technically but I never saw them that way."
I never thought of my brothers as only sharing half my DNA, the biological differences between us never had any weight on how I viewed our relationship. They are my brothers, my role models and they are amazing, loving and talented men. The term half-brothers degrades the relationship and how can they possibly be seen as "half brothers" when they each have my whole heart.
Next time you ask someone about their family dynamics, keep in mind that terms and labels have nothing to do with the love and relationships that take root. Some individuals have fathers but don't see them as such. Some have step-fathers that are the only Dad they've ever known. I have 2 amazing brothers, not half, but whole.
