If you’re like me, you have a lot of anxiety! One thing that comes with my anxiety is racing thoughts that sometimes consist of suicidal thoughts. Yes, don’t worry I’m on medications and am working through it but medications aren’t the solution to the problem. It takes effort as well. One of the coping skills that helps me a lot is reading. You’re probably thinking, “Oh I hate reading.” But reading takes you to another place. It fills your head with a story that you’re interested in getting to the end of. I'm going to tell you all about a few books that I’m interested in that have helped me in times of need.

1. "It’s Kind of a Funny Story" by Ned Vizzini

This novel is about a young boy named Craig who has always thought differently. Even though he’s in an elite school with an amazing group of friends and a nice family, something is off. The novel tells the story of Craig navigating through a psych ward trying to express himself through art.

This novel to me shows that even though a person can seem fine on the outside, doesn’t mean they’re fine on the inside. I love this story because it’s written by a man who also suffered from terrible thoughts who sadly lost his battle to suicide. However, he gave us a gift of this amazing story that has helped many get through their dark days.

2. "All The Bright Places" by Jennifer Niven

This novel is a love story about two very different teenagers. Violet and Finch are drawn to each other after getting paired up to do a class project together. Finch is sadly depressed but hides it from Violet very well. The story follows the two young ones, both so different, visiting places in their state, sharing a bond they don’t understand yet.

The story of Violet and Finch really did put a hole through my heart. I believe that they both deserved so much better. But it goes to show how love is the one thing that we have that is both passionate and terrifying. This story is a different one but it’s so beautiful and helped me realize the true meaning of love.

3. "Cut" by Patricia McCormick

This novel is about a teenage girl named Callie with a heavy addiction to cutting herself. Her parents are constantly arguing and her brother suffers with a deadly asthma condition. Because there is nothing physically wrong with her, she blames herself for these familial situations. After being admitted to Sea Pines, a correctional center for troubled girls, she realizes her problems are all solvable and that cutting herself only makes her hate herself more. After not talking to anyone there, her realization became clear from observing the other girls.

This story is different from any depression story I have read. I relate to Callie because she just wants to solve everyone else’s problems by making them her own and I do the same. It’s hard for Callie to open up and I realize that it’s the same way for me. The ending of the novel is quite intriguing as well but I won’t give that away!

4. "The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things" by Carolyn Mackler

This novel is about a sophomore, Virginia, at a private school in Manhattan who is overweight and very insecure about herself. With her mother being a teen psychologist, she can never get through to her mother with her problems. As the novel carries on, she realizes her feelings for her long time make out buddy Froggy and that she needs to change her life around to become happy with herself. She goes to Seattle to see her best friend Shannon and becomes a bit rebellious by dyeing her hair and getting a piercing. She takes up kickboxing to learn to channel her anger and changes everyone’s perspective of her.

The story of Virginia is one I can very much relate to. Especially because I’m overweight myself and struggle with what I want to do when I’m older. It’s interesting because I also colored my hair, got a few tattoos and took up colorguard as a form of getting out my anger too. Virginia’s story helped teach me that everyone has problems and only you can be the one to fix them.

5. "Everything I Never Told You" by Celeste Ng

This novel is a murder mystery. Lydia is dead. But they don’t know this yet. The Lee family is a Chinese American family living in the 1970s. They battle hardships with being called orientals and chinks and are said not to belong. When Lydia, the favorite child of Marilyn and James, is found dead in a lake, Marilyn does not stop until she knows exactly what happened to their little girl. But because she’s so determined to find out everything, she uncovers some of her daughters secrets she never was supposed to know.

This story is extremely interesting. Not only does it tell of racism and how they dealt with it back in the 1970s, but it also shows that everyone has secrets even if you think you know everything there is to know about a person. This novel definitely kept me on the edge of my seat the whole time and took me away to a place that was of interest and fantasy rather than bad thoughts and sadness.

6. Looking For Alaska by John Green

Miles, obsessed with last words, starts school at Culver Creek. His roommate nicknames him Pudge and introduces him to Alaska Young, a beautiful but emotionally unstable girl. Alaska tried to set Pudge up with a friend of hers but it ends badly and Pudge ends up falling into a deep love for Alaska. His new group of friends is obsessed with pranks and celebrates them by partying. Deliberately one night after a celebration, Alaska crashes her car and died instantly. But Pudge believes this was an act of suicide. Trying to figure out the death of Alaska, his group of friends and him perform one last prank in Alaska’s memory.

This story is all over the place with information but it’s a good one. I love novels with multiple story lines because it grabs your attention more. This is a sad one and it makes me upset to a high degree but it shows again how unstable a person can be. And this being John Green's first novel ever is surprising because it’s amazing.

My choices of novels are mostly related to suicide and depression but for a good reason. I’m obsessed with the before and after of something. What happens before a suicide and after, what happens before cutting and after, and what happens before therapy and after. I like the fact that even though terrible things happen, there is something that must happen after, the story must go on. There is not a story on this list that I have read that has a character die and then that’s it. I love seeing how the other characters react to it and deal with it. It’s a beautiful thing, life. Remember that there’s always something as simple as a book to distract your mind from your demons.