15 Times 'Bob’s Burgers' Served Up Pure Comedy Gold

15 Times 'Bob’s Burgers' Served Up Pure Comedy Gold

"Alriiiiiiiiight!"

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Ever since "Bob's Burgers" was taken off Netflix, I have been going through major withdrawal. So, I have been renting them from my library and watching them periodically. And as I was watching through the thirteen episodes of season one, it just proved to me how much I laugh during this show. It is incredibly funny, and I don't think people realize that.

So here are fifteen moments that are just too hilarious.

1. The Thanksgiving song that Linda came up with

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This is the episode where Linda has to pretend to be married to Mr. Fischoeder, her landlord, in order to get him a date with another woman. So, in order to raise her family's spirits, she writes a Thanksgiving song to brighten their holiday.

2. When the kids went to the rich neighborhoods for Halloween and Gene dressed up as Queen Latifah

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Tina, Gene, and Louise wanted to do something different this Halloween and went to the rich neighborhoods to get so much more candy. Not only do they lose all the candy they received, but they get into lots more trouble.

3. When Louise took personal offense when her mom gave up her room when they ran a bed and breakfast for a weekend

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All Linda wanted to do was open a bed and breakfast to earn some more cash for Tina's birthday party. But, of course, Louise had to make things just a little more difficult.

4. When Linda greatly defended her drunken escapades 

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Linda is a wine mom and won't let anyone get between her and a good bottle of wine.

5. Literally anything Bob says because his voice is hilarious

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It doesn't matter what Bob says, his voice makes everything he says hilarious and relatable.

6. When Tina had a place on her parents' bed just for her thrashing

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The family had a nice little sleepover in the parents' bedroom and Tina had to clarify exactly what she used her section for.

7. Every time Linda said her catchphrase "Alright" had me cracking up

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It doesn't matter the context in which she says it, it's always relevant.

8. When Bob started working at a community garden and couldn't have been happier

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Bob needed some space from the restaurant and a new hobby. What's a better place than a community garden where he can grow fresh produce for his food?

9. When Tina was learning how to drive and hit the only other car in the parking lot because she couldn't make a turning decision

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This scene gets me every time. Of course, Tina hits the only other car in the parking lot. And of course, that car belongs to Bob's arch-rival Jimmy Pesto.

10. When Gene put a twist on the joke "my eyes are up here"

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Leave it to Gene to make a joke funnier with his own little quirks

11. When Tina and Louise went to a Boyz 4 Now concert and Louise fell in love with Booboo 

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Louise was dragged to this concert and made fun of the girls who cried over the boy band. But she later developed a massive crush on one of the members and can't control her love.

12. When Tina thought that 'glasses' meant something a little different

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This was also from the Thanksgiving episode mentioned above, but Tina definitely made the toast better with her version.

13. When Gene learned the hard way to why people don't eat tacos on the toilet

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At first, Gene thought he was a genius doing something that would eventually catch on. Only to quickly realize why people don't do this.

14. When Linda said what everybody thinks when they see mini croissants

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Linda is a woman after her true desires. And mini croissants were calling her name.

15. And despite all the name-calling and whatnot, they are still a very loving family

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This one pulls more at the heartstrings than makes someone laugh, but it's still a tender moment with one of the funniest TV families.

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I Went To "The Bachelor" Auditions

And here's why you won’t be seeing me on TV.
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It’s finally time to admit my guilty pleasure: I have always been a huge fan of The Bachelor.

I can readily admit that I’ve been a part of Bachelor fantasy leagues, watch parties, solo watching — you name it, I’ve gone the whole nine yards. While I will admit that the show can be incredibly trashy at times, something about it makes me want to watch it that much more. So when I found out that The Bachelor was holding auditions in Houston, I had to investigate.

While I never had the intention of actually auditioning, there was no way I would miss an opportunity to spend some time people watching and check out the filming location of one of my favorite TV shows.

The casting location of The Bachelor, The Downtown Aquarium in Houston, was less than two blocks away from my office. I assumed that I would easily be able to spot the audition line, secretly hoping that the endless line of people would beg the question: what fish could draw THAT big of a crowd?

As I trekked around the tanks full of aquatic creatures in my bright pink dress and heels (feeling somewhat silly for being in such nice clothes in an aquarium and being really proud of myself for somewhat looking the part), I realized that these auditions would be a lot harder to find than I thought.

Finally, I followed the scent of hairspray leading me up the elevator to the third floor of the aquarium.

The doors slid open. I found myself at the end of a large line of 20-something-year-old men and women and I could feel all eyes on me, their next competitor. I watched as one woman pulled out her travel sized hair curler, someone practiced answering interview questions with a companion, and a man (who was definitely a little too old to be the next bachelor) trying out his own pick-up lines on some of the women standing next to him.

I walked to the end of the line (trying to maintain my nonchalant attitude — I don’t want to find love on a TV show). As I looked around, I realized that one woman had not taken her eyes off of me. She batted her fake eyelashes and looked at her friend, mumbling something about the *grumble mumble* “girl in the pink dress.”

I felt a wave of insecurity as I looked down at my body, immediately beginning to recognize the minor flaws in my appearance.

The string hanging off my dress, the bruise on my ankle, the smudge of mascara I was sure I had on the left corner of my eye. I could feel myself begin to sweat. These women were all so gorgeous. Everyone’s hair was perfectly in place, their eyeliner was done flawlessly, and most of them looked like they had just walked off the runway. Obviously, I stuck out like a sore thumb.

I walked over to the couches and sat down. For someone who for the most part spent most of the two hours each Monday night mocking the cast, I was shocked by how much pressure and tension I felt in the room.

A cop, stationed outside the audition room, looked over at me. After a brief explanation that I was just there to watch, he smiled and offered me a tour around the audition space. I watched the lines of beautiful people walk in and out of the space, realizing that each and every one of these contestants to-be was fixated on their own flaws rather than actually worrying about “love.”

Being with all these people, I can see why it’s so easy to get sucked into the fantasy. Reality TV sells because it’s different than real life. And really, what girl wouldn’t like a rose?

Why was I so intimidated by these people? Reality TV is actually the biggest oxymoron. In real life, one person doesn’t get to call all the shots. Every night isn’t going to be in a helicopter looking over the south of France. A real relationship depends on more than the first impression.

The best part of being in a relationship is the reality. The best part about yourself isn’t your high heels. It’s not the perfect dress or the great pick-up lines. It’s being with the person that you can be real with. While I will always be a fan of The Bachelor franchise, this was a nice dose of reality. I think I’ll stick to my cheap sushi dates and getting caught in the rain.

But for anyone who wants to be on The Bachelor, let me just tell you: Your mom was right. There really are a lot of fish in the sea. Or at least at the aquarium.

Cover Image Credit: The Cut

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All The TV Shows Returning This Month!

Check out all the great TV shows returning during May.

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May is here and has brought the return of a ton of great TV shows along with it!

Check out which of your favorite shows are back with new seasons this month and be sure not to miss them!

May 8th: "Lucifer"

Season 4 of "Lucifer" is airing on Netflix.

May 10th: "Easy"

This show about sex, love, and everything in between drops on Netflix on the 10th.

May 10th: "Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D."

This fan favorite returns to ABC on Friday the 10th.

May 10th: "Sneaky Pete"

Season 3 of "Sneaky Pete" is back on Amazon Prime Video.

May 13th: "The Bachelorette"

Hannah B. premieres as the new "Bachelorette" on ABC.

May 17th: "Fleabag"

This criminally underrated series hits Amazon Prime Video on the 17th.

May 23rd: "Elementary"

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Lucy Liu's NYPD drama returns to CBS on May 23rd.

May 23rd: "Vida"

Season 2 of "Vida" is back on STARZ on the 23rd.

May 24th: "She's Gotta Have It"

The second season of this Spike Lee inspired Netflix Original drops on Friday the 24th.

May 28th: "Animal Kingdom"

TNT's smash hit "Animal Kingdom" is back on May 28th.

May 29th: "Archer"

Everyone's favorite animated series returns with a new season on the 29th.

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