Turning 21 Is Better With Your Family

Turning 21 Is Better When Your Family Is Excited, Too

Because who doesn't want to take shots with their dad?

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My family has always been one of my favorite parts of my life. If you ask anyone I know, my family members are some of my closest friends and the people whose opinions I rely on the most. When I say that my mom is my best friend, it's really not an understatement.

And in my family, birthdays are a huge deal.

This Tuesday, it finally happened. I turned 21. I had been waiting for this day since I had started college. What I was unaware of, however, was that my family was even more excited about this than I was.

I showed up at dinner and in addition to surprise me with two family friends, my mom had a tiara and a sash for me, and by the time dinner was over, my dad had gotten everyone 21 and over to do a green tea shot with us at the restaurant bar.

I was already having a great birthday thanks to all of my wonderful friends, but my family only managed to make it even more fun for everyone.

So, without further ado, here are three reasons why turning 21 is the best when everyone is equally, if not even more, excited as you are:

1. They'll give you drink recommendations!

When I showed up to dinner on my birthday, I had no idea what I wanted to drink. The restaurant we went to brewed their own beer, but I wasn't sure if I would like it or not. I didn't know what kind of cocktails would go well with what I wanted to order, and the drink menu was albeit overwhelming. My mom was almost too eager to help me pick out a drink and eventually give me a beer recommendation when our waitress offered me a free sample since it was my birthday.

2. They don't try to ignore that you can drink.

My family knew that I was excited to be able to get a beer at a Phillies game, have wine at family functions, and try the specialty beers and cocktails at Universal Studios. Tuesday morning, I woke up to texts from two of my aunts telling me that one, she couldn't wait to eat tacos and drink margaritas, and from the other that she was so excited to take me to her favorite wine cellar next time I flew down to visit. The fact that they had planned these things made my birthday even better.

3. They drink with you!

My parents took shots with me after dinner on Tuesday. My dad and I are going to a sports bar this weekend to watch the Phillies game (my love for Scott Kingery is undying, and my boyfriend knows that). My mom wants to go to a Painting with a Twist session for Mother's Day, and a taco and margarita festival in September.

I was really nervous about turning 21 because I wasn't entirely sure how my family would feel about me being able to drink, but the fact that they were excited too just made it so much more fun for everyone that was out with us, and hopefully only proves to get even more fun.

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Working With People Who Are Dying Teaches You So Much About How To Live

Spending time with hospice patients taught me about the art of dying.

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Death is a difficult subject.

It is addressed differently across cultures, lifestyles, and religions, and it can be difficult to find the right words to say when in the company of someone who is dying. I have spent a lot of time working with hospice patients, and I bore witness to the varying degrees of memory loss and cognitive decline that accompany aging and disease.

The patients I worked with had diverse stories and interests, and although we might have had some trouble understanding each other, we found ways to communicate that transcended any typical conversation.

I especially learned a lot from patients severely affected by dementia.

They spoke in riddles, but their emotions were clearly communicated through their facial expressions and general demeanor, which told a story all on their own.

We would connect through smiles and short phrases, yes or no questions, but more often than not, their minds were in another place. Some patients would repeat the details of the same event, over and over, with varying levels of detail each time.

Others would revert to a child-like state, wondering about their parents, about school, and about family and friends they hadn't seen in a long time.

I often wondered why their minds chose to wander to a certain event or time period and leave them stranded there before the end of their life. Was an emotionally salient event reinforcing itself in their memories?

Was their subconscious trying to reconnect with people from their past? All I could do was agree and follow their lead because the last thing I wanted to do was break their pleasant memory.

I felt honored to be able to spend time with them, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was intruding on their final moments, moments that might be better spent with family and loved ones. I didn't know them in their life, so I wondered how they benefited from my presence in their death.

However, after learning that several of the patients I visited didn't have anyone to come to see them, I began to cherish every moment spent, whether it was in laughter or in tears. Several of the patients never remembered me. Each week, I was a new person, and each week they had a different variation of the same story that they needed to tell me.

In a way, it might have made it easier to start fresh every week rather than to grow attached to a person they would soon leave.

Usually, the stories were light-hearted.

They were reliving a memory or experiencing life again as if it were the first time, but as the end draws nearer, a drastic shift in mood and demeanor is evident.

A patient who was once friendly and jolly can quickly become quiet, reflective, and despondent. I've seen patients break down and cry, not because of their current situation, but because they were mourning old ones. These times taught me a lot about how to be just what that person needs towards the end of their life.

I didn't need to understand why they were upset or what they wanted to say.

The somber tone and tired eyes let me know that what they had to say was important and worth hearing. What mattered most is that someone who cared was there to hear it.

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My First College Gal Pal Road Trip Was Amazing

Every girl should have one good girls trip.

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In some way or another, everybody has a list of things they want to do in their lives before it's all over. After all, we're human. There's adventure to be had in every life. One thing I have always wanted to do before I grew too old and grey was go on a road trip with my gal pals to the beach. A couple weeks ago, I achieved this memorable milestone, and it allowed me to open up to new surroundings and experiences.

On this trip, I went with two of my friends from college, Kait and Lindsey, to visit my roommate Elizabeth in Virginia Beach. This was pretty big for Lindsey and I because neither of us had been to Virginia Beach before. Thankfully Elizabeth and Kait knew their way around the city, so we never got lost on our way to and fro.

Like most vacations, my favorite parts probably took place at the beach. I'm always at utter peace stomping through mushy sand or leaning down to splash the salty water that tries to knock my short self over. We took pictures and did something us college girls rarely have time to do especially in school: Relax.

The four of us did not live up to the crazed stereotype of girl trips in movies. Although I finally got a chance to sing along to Taylor Swift in a car ride with my friends, so that's always a plus. We played "Top Golf" one day, and by some miracle, I actually won the second game by a fair amount after much humiliation in the first one. We visited some of Elizabeth's family, and I finally got to meet her giant dog Apollo (I call him 'Wolf Dog'). Everyday was another chance to ask with enthusiasm: "So what are we doing today?"

Our trip wasn't like the movies where we all cried or confessed our deepest darkest secrets. Everything the four of us shared was laughter and this calm feeling of being at home, in the chaotic peace of each other's company. We understand each other a little better due to finally seeing what we're like outside of Longwood University. After this, all I can say is that we're most definitely planning the next one!

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