Breakups are never easy. You spent time investing into the relationship, growing with that person, being vulnerable, and creating some of the best memories with that person. It is a special connection that just can't be duplicated with someone else.
Now, imagine that person being your best friend. Realizing that I had grown apart from my best friend hurt and left me confused, but I realized being honest about the whole situation was the best thing I could do.
For starters, she and I met when we were both in junior high. I was going into eighth grade and she was in seventh. Easily, our friendship started by fan-girling over One Direction and Justin Bieber. It was the best. We use to even imagine our lives if she married Liam Payne and I married Niall Horan.
Aside from our love of one particular boyband, she supported me through one of the hardest stages of my life. When I was in seventh grade, I started going to see a therapist for my depression and anxiety. I felt like nobody understood me except for my best friend. Whenever I was having an episode, she easily calmed me down and actually listened to me, which was something I wasn't use to. I previously suffered through some extreme bullying issues and got pulled out of my school just to get away from it. I felt a bit isolated from people, but my best friend made me feel okay.
Due to going through five years of bullying, I just assumed nobody would like me, yet she proved me wrong, of course. She was there when I started going to public school and helped ease some of the nerves I was having about going back to the classroom setting. I felt extremely grateful for her.
However, we were already experiencing the hardest part of our friendship; she lived in South Carolina while I lived in Pennsylvania. Sure, we Skyped every time that we could and texted each other like crazy, but it was hard.
She was such a huge part of my life. I told her about all the drama going on in my school, my crush, and secrets nobody to this day will know. She was my person. If you would have asked either of us, I'm pretty sure we could tell you what the other's life was like. Or at least I like to think we could do that.
Our friendship only strengthened throughout high school, but there definitely were times we got into fights. Those fights, I like to believe, added to our bond because we learned about one another and grew. Yet, deep down, I knew we were already becoming different people, which also was okay to me. I never thought people have to be identical to get along, so it was even better finding different interests and trying new things with her.
Recently, despite how many great memories we have together and how long we've been friends, I've realized that we are just growing a part. Even though a year isn't a huge age difference, I started college this year, while she was in her senior year of high school.
We are both in different chapters of our lives. It wasn't even until this semester that I realized how much we've grown apart until I stopped talking to her less and less.
Maybe it's the distance that makes it hard to communicate in a long distance friendship, or maybe we are just two different people who have nothing in common anymore. There is something wrong though when you're more excited to visit friends from college over the summer rather than going down to South Carolina like you've always imagined would happen.
What I'm hoping is that we just need time apart. She's going to be headed to college in the fall, and I know she's going to be fully immersed into her respective University like I am here at Temple.
My best friend is always going to be a significant part of my life. Nothing is ever going to change that. However, I think it's time to say "see you later" for now. I am hoping, sometime in the future, her and I will find our connection again.
So, to my best friend, thank you. You were my person, my Cristina Yang, and I hope I did a good job being your Meredith Grey. Yet, they even parted ways to explore and grow. Hopefully, we'll find each other again and continue being the dynamic duo we were when we were younger. Thank you for making me smile and listen to me rant about whatever boy broke my heart that particular week.
You'll always be in my heart.