I've always considered myself as an independent girl, but when it really came down to it, I felt like I was hit with a ton of bricks at once. Not long ago did I experience that exact feeling. About two weeks ago, I moved into my first apartment (seems exciting, yet it was one of the most stressful experiences of my life.) I walked into my apartment expecting there to be a bed where I could comfortably relax after a long trip from Maryland to Tennessee.
But boy, was I wrong.
That night I slept on my apartment floor with nothing but a blanket and a pillow. The feeling of privilege quickly overwhelmed me. The next day my bed arrived, where once again I was surprised by the idea that it was not already made for me. As soon as the UPS man delivered my bed in pieces, I sat on that same bedroom floor with wood and nails completely unsure how to use a screwdriver (which every person on this planet should know how to use).
As I sat on that floor tears came to my eyes as I saw nothing but wood in front of me. At that point, I realized that bed wasn't going to build itself and if I didn't get off the ground and get to work I would spend my entire junior year sleeping on that carpet. So, believe it or not, I built that bed, desk and bedside table, and I did it with pride. At this moment, I realized I was too dependent on men in my life, not only romantically but physically.
Even though I had considered myself independent it wasn't until the true test presented itself that I realized I was the exact opposite.
I came to a few conclusions over the course of this bed building.
One: When I wanted to break down and cry I realized nothing in life comes to those who pout, especially on the bedroom floor.
Two: Instead of waiting for your boat to come to you, swim out to it (not literally!)
Three: If you want something to happen, do it. Don't depend on someone else, DEPEND on yourself. Be independent, it's in style, just like Kylie Jenner's lipgloss.
If you need groceries, go to the store. Don't wait around for your friends to make the trip because you're afraid you'll see your ex-boyfriend in the check-out line. If you want to go see the newest movie but don't want to go alone, do it. No one can see you in the dark (kidding). But really, go for it. The only person stopping you is yourself. If you feel like life is approaching all at once, take a break, collect yourself and realize you are ready to build that bed and make a change.
Like the famous Gandhi once said, "Be the change you wish to see in the world."
And it's true, you are responsible for building that bed, or you can let it sit in that box.
