"Men always say that as the defining compliment, don't they? She's a cool girl. Being the Cool Girl means that I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she's hosting the world's biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all - hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don't mind, I'm the Cool Girl."

- Gillian Flynn "Gone Girl"

There are so many times growing up where boys have told me to "just be cool," and now as an adult, I want to tell them to suck it.

I abandoned the aspiration to be a "cool girl" very early in life, and I'm so glad that I did. Throughout my life the "cool girl" has been described as many things. She knows all about sports, and loves the same team as you. She doesn't care what she looks like at all, but somehow always looks like a supermodel. She never takes more than five minutes to get ready because there's no way that she wears makeup. She's "one of the guys" but still the "right amount" of feminine. Your friends are jealous, but she'd never flirt with them. She loves beer and never gains weight. She plays video games, but doesn't beat you. She's not emotional, and doesn't get mad or jealous or cry.

Shut up.

I am, if I do say so myself, one of the coolest girls to ever exist, and so is every other girl out there. Every girl is a "cool girl" for the right person. Guys, just because you haven't found your perfect one yet doesn't mean that you have to create this ridiculous girl hierarchy on the quest for them to seem "cool" to you. And girls, do not perpetuate this hierarchy and direct it towards each other.

I don't understand or care about football, I care what I look like whenever I feel like it, and wear makeup whenever I feel like it. I don't always look like a supermodel, and it's not effortless. I drink wine out of the box. I'm not "one of the guys," I just get along with people who are right for me.

And I do get mad. I do get jealous. I do cry. I shouldn't feel confined to some stupid "cool girl" box. I shouldn't have to think every time I have an emotion, "oh, he wouldn't like me if I said that." I don't care. If you like me, you like me. If you don't, then you don't. Get over yourself.

Girls can feel however they feel, and they can like and do whatever they want. There are still times in my adult life where I have to consciously tell myself to not care what a man thinks of me. Where I have to remind myself not to go out of my way or suppress my personality or feelings. That's ridiculous. Be yourself. If anyone dislikes it, they can choose not to be around you. If a guy doesn't like you or isn't interested, then let it go. He's not the one for you.

You're too much of a "cool girl" for him, anyway.

To be fair, expectations for "the one" are ridiculous for both genders. Especially for someone you haven't met yet. You could fall in love with anyone. Become friends with anyone. Listen to Bo Burnham and chill out.

PS - Someone in The Odyssey community - write the "Cool Guy" article, PLEASE!