My mom called me the other day and told me my sister was being picked on and bullied again. My outrage was hard to contain for I'm at college 3,000 miles away from my younger sister who is in one of the toughest educational stages of her life: middle school.
I started speaking rapidly and loudly, suggesting she go to the principal or that my sister show these bullies what she is made of. My mom talked sense into me, reminding me that my idea wasn't the best one. And while intimidation from being called into the principal's office helps alleviate the bullying for a while, it always comes back, and schools tend not to take these issues so seriously unless there are threats or evidence. “They're just kids” they say. No, they are growing kids, kids that will be contributing to society in a few years, kids that need to be taught right from wrong in order to be good people. But it might be naive to think this is practical in application.
Not only is my sister, and all those around her, going through puberty, but the nastiness of middle school permeates the hallways and classrooms. For many of us, it has been a while since we have thought about middle school because most people don't find it particularly life changing or significant. Now while that is true looking back as a college student, I can definitely still remember the insults, cliques, and demeaning experiences I had; those thoughts are embedded into my memory. For me, hearing about my sister being bombarded with ridiculous, silly, and false insults hurts. For anyone with a younger sibling, you know how it feels to hear this. While many of these comments are harmless and no one is physically “beating her up,” I know that on the inside it is beating up not only her, but me too.
Now as an adult I realize things get better with time; they really do. You grow and mature. You learn to deal with, and avoid, petty and negative people. However, to my middle-school self, it was hard to get that message across. I'm writing this to serve as a reminder of the nastiness that comes with adolescence and as reassurance that it gets better. This is a reminder to all of us that have younger siblings to remember when we were in their shoes and support them. We are role models to them and they need to learn how to stand up for themselves and move on, just like we learned to do. It's tough hearing about this verbal bullying my sister is experiencing; it's tough knowing that bullying and cyber bullying are still tremendous issues; it's tough being 3,000 miles away from the problem. But there's nothing I can do but encourage and support my sister, encourage all older siblings to do the same, and speak out against the verbal harassment that hurts my sister.
