This summer, I have had multiple men tell me that I need to stop worrying.
Does this phrase sound familiar? If you are reading this then I assume it is. It is possibly one of the most annoying phrases I have ever heard.
I worry because I have bad anxiety and especially when it's about someone I care for. So when I meet someone new, I feel that they may or may not like me the way I want them to. So I started to become anxious and worried that I wasn't enough for this person. Men didn't find that "attractive" yet they still want to know the real me?
Anxiety IS the real me and if they can't handle that, how could they handle anything else?
Ladies, don't change yourself or try to be someone you not because you are trying to win a guy over. He doesn't see that this is just a part of you to love, not something to be scared off with because they didn't let you explain the real you.
The real me is someone who deals with this anxiety every single day. I never want to try to be with a person who doesn't want to see that part of me. That is like cutting off a piece of myself and leaving it at home for me to deal with later.
Dating in today's world is like trying to win a popularity contest. You have to have everything perfect and present this image of perfection that resonates with your prospective date. If you take a wrong turn, you may end up scaring them back into the void that you started in. You now worry about the fact that you possibly ruined everything because they couldn't handle it.
I am ready to handle just about anything but a lot of people aren't ready to dive into what makes people who they are. It is kind of a mystery as to how you are supposed to "act" around those potential dates. I feel myself caving in every time I realize that showing the real me isn't going to happen unless something is actually defined between us. Walking on eggshells isn't exactly fun to do and I realized that to make the worrying go away, sometimes you actually have to give in to it.