So there's been many articles and suggestions in life on how to deal with a broken heart and get through the healing process in a healthy way. For example, many people say to talk about it, to think about the positive things that still exist in your life, to find a new hobby, to find a new relationship or what I've been told a million times is to simply "let it go" and move on. All of those suggestions are great but they are not obviously always easy and unfortunately like many, I don't know how to express my feelings vocally the way I desperately wish I could so I keep it locked inside. I also can't seem to fully let go of certain things in the past because I think the toughest war in life is the war between your heart and head. Your heart wants to let go of certain places, people and moments and heal itself but your head remembers every little detail of what you miss. It picks at your brain and heart with memories and used to be's reminding you of everything you can't change and everything that's been broken then fixed a thousand times.

Over this time, personal experience and faith in God, I've realized and learned some things can never really be fixed, just mended and bandaged for a moment. The scars of past love will always be with you but I find that those scars are beautiful in a sense that you can say you did truly love. You can keep those scars and remember that honest love is real, it’s hidden beneath those scars and I think it's a beautiful thing to always know and be reminded that love is somehow there even if it's a sad memory. You'll always feel some level of hurt thinking about it late at night but the hurt changes from a dagger in your heart to a thorn pricking you in the side. It goes from being in your mind constantly to just crossing it every once in a while. The haunting of past love that once was an echo in the hall becomes more of a whisper in the wind. So you see? It never truly leaves, it just becomes more distant in the fog and more silent in your heart and head.

I learned that it's okay to remember the pain because pain reminds us we're human. I also believe even if you "let it go" it'll always somehow be a part of you but I've come to the conclusion that I'm fine with that because it's just part of life and with pain comes growth. I believe you can hurt over something but still show mercy and give forgiveness at the same time. Always continue to love through the hurt because I promise there's strength in weakness and beauty in the broken. Just ask Jesus, He knows best.