Beautiful Girls Can Feel Insecure

Society's Impossible Beauty Standards Make Even The Prettiest Girls Feel Insecure

You can believe you're pretty while feeling insecure.

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The girl reading this right now is beautiful. She may be beautiful and confident, or she may be beautiful and insecure. I know it may sound ironic, when a person knows they're good looking but still sees a flaw in them in some way. But the sad reality is that almost everyone has at least one thing about themselves they wish they could change, no matter how many compliments they get. Society makes us become rarely satisfied with ourselves, always worried we'll be judged on the smallest of things that no one sees wrong with.

You're either insecure, confident, or conceited. Sometimes you're all three, it just depends on your mood.

Up until now, I'm not sure which category I'd put myself in. I'm definitely too humble to be conceited, and that's not a way I'd want to live life, thinking I look better than everyone else. Beauty comes in all forms and I appreciate them. So that just leaves confident and insecure. I feel both of these as if they were moods.

One day I could be feeling myself, my hair voluminous, shiny, bouncing after every step I take, wearing a cute outfit with cute shoes to match, and having my makeup done really well. Then there are my not-so-perfect days when my hair looks kinda flat and feels gross since I haven't washed it in three days, I can't find a good outfit or I'm wearing loose, comfy, baggy sweats, and I present the dark eye circles on my natural face, letting the world know I'm tired of school and life itself.

Don't get me wrong though, just because a girl is dressed down and comfortably doesn't mean she looks bad. You're obviously still beautiful and can still be confident when you're not dressed up. In my case, if I don't feel good, then I assume I don't look good, which may be where the insecurity, rather than confidence, plays in.

This is common in a lot of girls. You'll hear the phrase, "No, don't, I look like trash right now!" when their friends take a video of them for their story. Her friends don't think that, though. She looks absolutely fine, pretty even. But in other cases, the appearances are deeper than outfits, makeup, and hair itself. Sometimes it has to do with society's expectation of beauty. The endless standards that are more often than not unrealistic — full lips, long eyelashes, clear skin, thick eyebrows, petite and defined nose, strong jawline, curves, small waist, wide hips, thick thighs, flat stomach, the list goes on forever. Holding women up to these specific standards can definitely have a beautiful girl feel less confident in herself.

Media makes you believe you need to look a certain way to be seen as drop dead gorgeous when you already hold your own unique beauty. Having a South Asian nose instead of a Eurocentric nose does not mean you're ugly. Having smaller lips rather than full ones does not mean you're ugly. And not being the curviest girl in the room shouldn't make you feel like you're not attractive, either.

Though I advocate for rising above insecurities and finding happiness within your own beauty, I do believe insecurities are a normal thing and a lot of people have them. As humans, we're imperfect beings who tend to strive for perfect or near perfect. We'll tend to want the things we don't have and take the things that should be valued for granted. If you are insecure, just know you're not alone. Sometimes we can't help but feel the way we do about certain things about ourselves. But I promise you, someone thinks you're beautiful and is attracted to you for exactly how you look like, even if you think you're flawed.

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I Hate That I Struggle To Love My 'Midsize' Body

I gained a few pounds, but that shouldn't be the end of the world, yet it is in a sense.

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Junior year of college has been quite the wild ride. I've had the best academic year of my entire life, yet struggled, in the end, to even want to get anything done. I didn't care about a lot of the things that used to matter to me.

I gained weight at the beginning of my second semester and went up a jean size, so half of my summer wardrobe just doesn't fit me anymore, and it's made me feel embarrassed. I went from a size 6 to an 8/10, and while it doesn't seem like a big jump to the average person, it was to me. I don't like looking in the mirror and seeing a bigger pooch than usual, or how my thighs have gotten super irritated because they also got bigger. Chaffing I used to only have in the summer occurred in late January and even scared my inner thighs. It's not cute and it hurts when it flares up. I am terrified to wear my bikinis again because I know they won't fit, and the second I put on shorts my thighs are going to want to kill me if I don't kill them first.

I came to really love my body last summer after struggling through a rough breakup where I stopped caring about myself. I owned myself last summer and as much as I want to again this summer, I'm really struggling with the idea of it.

All I feel like I see on social media are skinny girls with zero hint of a pooch or thick thighs in sight. I've never been a skinny girl and I never want to be, but I can't help but envy the people I've seen online and in person. Of course, what I see on social media isn't really accurate, but it's still been tough to look at these girls who seem like they don't have a care in the world. They can eat whatever they want and still look flawless. They can throw on a bikini and not have to feel like they need to suck everything in so no one sees their pooch hanging over their bikini bottom. As a stress eater who is still too terrified to try on her bikinis, I'm not looking forward to showing my body off when all I want to do sometimes is hide it because I don't feel happy with what I see.

I will always love being a curvier girl and YouTubers like Sierra Schultzzie, Carrie Dayton, and Lucy Wood have given me a new boost of inspiration to embrace the body I have right now. I'm not skinny but I'm not plus sized either. I feel pressure from myself and certain people in my life to be skinnier and not "let myself go." I

'm so happy to have friends who have helped me through my struggles and support me, even when I don't want to support myself. These YouTuber's have opened my eyes to the fact that this body deserves to be loved just as much as my former, smaller body.

I want to love myself with 100% of my being and I hate how much hatred I've allowed to go on inside of me. There is only one me and I need to be proud of her. Maybe she gained some weight and isn't what society expects from a girl, but she's still amazing and has so much to offer.

I wish I could see more girls like me on YouTube or social media offering a representation of my body type, which I hardly ever see. Aerie and American Eagle have done a fantastic job of including different body types and it's been a great help in seeing that they really to make clothes for all types of women, not just a size zero to two. Added representation really does wonders for someone suffering from low body confidence like me.

While I hope to begin my journey into losing a few pounds this summer by jogging whenever I get the chance, I'm not going to put intense pressure on myself to look a certain way. I am single for the summer and exploring life with my best friends by my side. I'm here to be the best version of me that I can. I cannot let negative thoughts about myself to dictate how I feel every day. I am strong, I am beautiful, and I need to love myself and my body as I am.

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To All Lawmakers, Keep Your Laws Off My Body

My body, my choice.

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This past week, Ohio and Alabama received a lot of attention in the media after bold decisions were made regarding abortion laws in these two states. Alabama has signed an extreme abortion ban into law which gives no exception for even rape or incest. Women and doctors could end up facing 99 years in prison for performing an abortion in this state. In most cases, rapists only serve about 6 years of jail time. This means that a woman could spend more time in jail for attempting to abort the fetus than the man who planted it inside of her. In Ohio, similar laws are being put in place that denies women from getting an abortion as soon as a fetal heartbeat is detected. However, that is only 5 weeks into the pregnancy, or one week late of a period. Most women do not even know they are pregnant at that time.

I originally was very hesitant to write this article. Not because I did not know what I thought about the issue, but rather because I was afraid what other people would think of me writing about this. I'm typically not one to post anything too political but there comes a time when something must be said.

When it comes to abortion laws, pro-life advocates often argue that the fetus could be the next Einstein or the person to cure cancer. However, the women who are going to be taking care of the child could have potentially done the same. Instead, they are often forgotten about and their lives are changed for good. There are so many women who will have to give up so much such as their education, career, and happiness as a result of the laws that are being put into place.

Furthermore, if a woman is not capable of taking care of a child at the time she gets pregnant, the child will end up being the one to suffer the most. If the woman has no option but to keep the baby, the baby has the potential of growing up in an unstable home where it will not have the resources it needs to live.

Pro-life advocates push for women to just give the child up for adoption, but that has its own set of problems. If the woman puts the baby up for adoption, there is a ginormous possibility that the child will live their entire life going in and out of our country's broken foster care system. Lawmakers should not be advocating for the protection of fetuses unless they are able to make sure the fetus will be able to grow up in a stable environment.

Putting laws to prevent abortion into place isn't going to stop abortions from happening. Instead, it is going to make women turn to hazardous practices that could end up with them harming themselves. Many people, including some pro-life advocates, have even admitted that the bills being put into place are too far.

The most amazing thing to me about the bills being signed into place is that the support for them is heavily reliant on men. It is very easy to jump behind supporting something that doesn't affect you. These men will never be able to experience what it is like to carry a child around for nine months and care for it after. That is why it makes absolutely no sense that they are able to tell women what they can and can't do with their bodies.

Being pro-choice is not necessarily being pro-abortion. It is being for women to have the freedom to do what they believe is best for themselves. A women's right to make her own choices should not be a conservative or democratic issue. It is a human issue. It shouldn't matter what the circumstances are. If a woman feels she is not ready for a child she should have the ability to do what is needed to be done. I hope that as a country we are able to take the necessary steps to prevent us from moving back in time. So to all lawmakers, keep your laws off of my body.

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