We all have opinions– and love to share them too– however, learning the tactful art of biting your tongue can do you more favors than not. Many different conversations and situations present themselves to us on a day to day basis. Arising from these conversations are opinions and perspectives– some of which we may not always agree with – and that's expected! Being mindful of this, it's important to feel out a situation and the people involved in the situation before acting on impulse and blurting out your opinion.
Waiting until a confrontation ends before expressing your opinion can help you prevent a situation from getting too heated. Let's say you have a group of friends that sit you down to have a conversation, they begin critiquing you on things that you feel to be invalid. Do you act out on the fact that you feel wronged to the advantaged three people, obviously being the one at a disadvantage? Or do you walk away from the situation and express your opinion one on one to each member involved? Perhaps isolating each issue with each friend involved in the gang up can help diffuse the situation and prevent the circumstance from getting too heated. Rather than an in-the-moment, rash opinion being blurted out during the confrontation–stemmed from being upset– you express a genuine concern for how everything was mishandled to each member in an intimate one on one conversation behind closed doors.
Sometimes it's better to wait until you can vent your opinion to an unbiased third party behind closed doors. Let's say you feel as though they'll never listen to your perspective and have convinced themselves that their wrongdoings are justified. Instead of avoiding the friends involved completely, try expressing your concerns and explaining the whole situation to a close friend or family member that has zero involvement with the people you feel wronged by. Hearing the opinion of a third party close to you can often provide you with clarity and reason for why they may feel the way they do.
CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES. If you feel as though someone, who you don't even know, is rude to you or gives you a dirty look– whatever it may be– know when it's worth addressing and when walking away is the best option for you. The negative opinions of strangers are of no concern to you- why prove a point to someone who has already chosen to treat you negatively before even knowing you? It's not worth your time.
Keeping these approaches in mind, try your hand at biting your tongue in situations where you feel you haven't been given enough time to evaluate the situation, feel wronged and know you may say something you regret, or are simply approached by someone looking to have an issue with you. If it's not progressive or beneficial to the betterment of a relationship that matters to you (Family, friends, classmates, etc), don't bother.
