When I was 10-years old I hated Angelina Jolie. Of course, I had never actually met her or even seen a single one of her movies. But what I had seen was a VH1 special describing how she deviously stole Brad Pitt away from Jennifer Aniston. Despite not actually knowing who anyone of these people were, I still felt so strongly that Jolie was completely evil for “stealing" someone's husband, and I vowed to never go see any of her work (interestingly enough, this rule did not apply to Brad Pitt). It wasn't until years later that I realized how ridiculous this attitude was. Since then I've discovered that Angelina Jolie is a talented, Oscar-winning actress and Goodwill Ambassador who has been involved in numerous campaigns for childhood education, international refugees, and women's rights. Yet, the first descriptors I ever saw attached to her name were “home wrecker" and “thief."
The reason I'm telling you this story is to illustrate how often the media creates and promotes one-dimensional, negative roles for female celebrities. It's the same reason why Taylor Swift was mocked for years as “that girl who only wrote mean songs about her ex-boyfriends" or why any mention of Kristen Stewart's name was usually followed by some comment about how she “never smiles."
Rarely, is attention ever given to Taylor setting a world record by being the only artist in history to have three albums sell over a million copies in a single week. The industry is not interested in Kristen's constant promotion of better-written roles for women in Hollywood, only in her facial expressions in front of the paparazzi.
And the sad part is we all fall for these stories, again and again, because our culture constantly pits women against each other. We want to focus on their supposed flaws because we've been conditioned to see them as competition rather than individuals. Society has us feeling threatened by anyone seen as prettier, smarter, or more successful, so we tear them down rather than appreciate our own talents.
The best solution to avoid making these snap judgments, even when they're all around you, is to remind yourself that famous people are still just people. They are as complicated and sensitive as you and me, and cannot be defined by a single label. Just as you wouldn't want your best friends or sisters reduced to a stereotype, you should approach pop culture in the same way.
More women supporting women can only help make the world we live in a less toxic place by focusing energy on building up self-esteem, rather than wasting it on anger or jealousy. So I just wanted to say to all those famous ladies I've insulted, or held pointless grudges against: I'm sorry. I didn't know any better.
