One of the biggest punchlines that you’ve known in your life is the classic “doctor vs. engineer” stereotype. You’ve got two poisons to choose from, you must choose one, and if you don’t, well…

Good one. Seriously, which one will it be?

Growing up in John’s Creek (but you know it’s actually called “Little India”), a large number of us have only known these two options our whole lives, and while some of us have been lucky enough to have parents that give us the freedom to choose our own careers, the rest of us have succumbed to their demands on at least one occasion, if not more.

The standard formula for success, as you may know, goes like this in our parents’ heads: first you must accomplish X, then that will get you to Y, and after working hard enough you’ll end up at Z, at which point you can get married, settle down, have a few children and call it a day (or in this case, an entire lifetime).

There’s meaning behind the madness- so today, I want to tell you why.

Take a second to think about how you got here in the first place. After gathering up their courage and saving every last penny, a majority of our parents took the risky trek to an entirely new country, where they hoped to earn in dollars instead of Rupees, make a bang for their buck and prosper in the glorious land of the free. Their struggles are those which you will never know. After all, you’ve been born into the luxurious lifestyle and promising country that they only once dreamed of. You’ve never had to sleep on the floor of a one-bedroom apartment, you’ve never had to walk miles to the nearest grocery store because you don’t have a car yet and you’ve never had to sacrifice luxuries you were always used to back home simply so you could pay the next phone bill. Chances are, you don’t know what it’s like to move to an entirely new country -- away from your family and anyone you know -- and work your way up all the way from the bottom.

But they do.

So imagine what happens when you tell them that you don’t want to pursue that money-making degree, that you don’t want to sit at a desk all day, and that you want more from your life than a 9 to 5 job and a stable income.

Again, good joke.

Now, here's my disclaimer: these stories are not meant to generalize us all into one accepted situation; rather, they're based on my own experiences and those which I've seen or heard within our community over the years. Each of us has our own unique story, as do our families. There’s a good chance that either you or your parents fit this description, but there’s also a good chance that you or your parents don’t fit it at all-- I know mine don't entirely-- in which case, I’ve never been happier to be proven wrong (you go, Glen Coco).

However, here’s the issue-- there’s another good chance that at some point in your lifetime, you’ve felt pressured to follow a career pathway that you really didn’t want to. It may have been the pressure to validate your parent’s struggles, the pressure from your friends going to all those medical camps, the pressure from their parents wondering why you aren’t as involved or perfect as their children are- and that’s okay because that’s normal.

But should it be?

Peer pressure is inherent from any friend group, as other’s decisions will almost always greatly affect our own. In my own experience, I’ve gone from wanting to be a doctor to a lawyer, to a manager, back to a doctor, somehow to a chef (?) and back to a manager again. The reason why, I’ve come to realize, isn’t entirely due to my indecisiveness-- it’s due to the environment I’ve been brought up in.

The truth is that a lot of us tend to let the stereotypes, the parents and the over-achieving friends get to our heads, and we lose a little bit of ourselves every time we do it. The sole reason why I don’t know what I want to do with my life yet is not because I can’t decide, but because I’m afraid that it won’t be good enough- that my parents took all those risks and went through all those struggles, only for me to end up doing worse than they did.

I’m not alone in this fear, and I know that you've probably felt it before too.

I would be lying if I told you that you can be anything you want to be. Many of us really do believe in this sentiment, and that’s perfectly okay, but the reality for a few of us is that we will never be able to break past our parents’ “doctor vs. engineer” expectations, and our poison will have to be chosen. Another select few of us will have the freedom to choose what we want to do, but financial burdens and inherent obligations will severely alter our decisions.

So here’s the good news, part two.

There’s a reason why the “American” part at the end of our hyphen exists-- we’re changing the dynamic of the way our culture is perceived. Never before had we challenged these stereotypical viewpoints until we realized that our own lives were in our own hands, and that nobody could look at us at birth and decide our fates for us. Never before had we imagined that for once, we could draw our own paths, rather than have have them laid out in front of us. Never before did such a bold, controversial idea of individualism ever dare cross our minds.

Never before did we even bother to think that if “All Is Well” (reference intended), that all actually would be.

Think again.

Regardless of what path you choose and where it takes you, I can guarantee you that it will be.