I went into my second year of college not so confident in my ability to make friends. I knew that I wanted to reach out and meet new people, but I always felt self-conscious about myself—my personality, my looks, basically everything else. I was so worried that people would judge me on just about anything they could find.

I tried to make friends. I talked to people, put myself in awkward situations, and tried to reach out as much as I could. No matter what I tried, I just wasn’t connecting with people like I had hoped I would. I made a few acquaintances, but I wanted something beyond that.

It turns out that I made the best friends by accident. I grew closer to the people I saw every day. Those who saw the natural me and not the awkward-trying-to-make-friends me were the easiest to talk to. The best part was that I didn’t have to constantly wrack my brain to try to think of something to say or worry that they were judging me. They liked me for who I really was.

Now these people are my closest friends. They don’t judge me like I had worried. I don’t feel like I have to impress them or lose their interest.

If you’re struggling to make friends like I was, stop trying so hard. Look around at the people you already know. Some of the best friendships could be right in front of you.