How's it going up there? I'm sure you're having the best time and it's everything you ever thought it would be.

I know you're watching me from above, and you probably laugh at some of my mistakes and shake your head in disapproval of some of my other ones. I'm doing the same thing down here.

The truth is, I'm writing this because I miss you. I miss being able to talk to you whenever I pleased. Yes, I still talk to you, and I'm sure you know that, but it's different now.

I miss being able to hear your voice and feel your hugs. I miss when going to your house meant a sleepover and talking all night, not getting something out of storage.

I miss seeing you at my events, and Lord knows how much it pains me knowing you won't physically be present to watch me graduate or walk down the aisle to marry the love of my life, who will still have to gain your approval. Even though you're no longer here to give it, I'll know if he passes your test.

I want to thank you for still being present, even though you can't physically be here any longer. I feel your presence the days I need it most. You make those days so much better. Thank you for being my guardian angel.

I want to apologize for never going to see you. I've always thought it'd be too hard on me, but I've realized that's selfish of me to think that. I promise that I'll come to see you soon, and maybe I'll even stop by with some Twizzlers or jerky or play some Johnny Horton for old time's sake.

Friday marks four years without you, and I can't even pretend to say that it's not hitting me pretty hard. I wonder if you think about it too. Do you think about us in heaven? Maybe I have to wait until I'm up there to find out.

If this letter reaches you, I think the one thing I want you to know is that I love you. I miss you too. Oh, and a spiritual hug or something would be nice too.

I miss you. I love you. And I cannot wait to see you again. I hope you take care up there.