1. She loves Ole Miss. (Proof)
2. She publicly dissed Alabama.
Katy Perry was seen everywhere on Game Day! From being the guest picker to starting the "Hotty Toddy” chant in the Grove. Not to mention she stormed the field from her front row seat and even dove off the bar at Funky’s to end her night. This girl has Rebel blood running through her veins. Katy was the only one who chose Ole Miss for the win and boy was she excited to rub it in Saban’s face on Twitter. HYDR to that one Katy Perry!
3. She would "out Grove" the majority of this school.
Katy Perry knows how to have a great time (obviously). She would wake up early and go to bed late like a true Rebel. She would tent hop while borrowing cups, sneaking spinach puffs, and accidentally knocking over someone’s vintage rebel statue. Twice.
4. She’d be the best/worst formal date.
You know we’ve all had that one formal date. You know the one. That’s Katy Perry. She’d likely hit the dance floor solo, lead the crowd in the Cha-Cha slide, sing a killer karaoke version of “Come on Eileen” with the bouncers and then chill with your pledge brothers on the couch watching Blue Mountain State while drinking a beer. You just have no words.
5. She would have the world’s most amazing swap box.
Coming to the game dressed as though she was attending a 90’s/punk rock/Ole Miss
themed swap, Katy had some serious hater blockers on. I’m sure her swap box would be over flowing with tutus and glitter. Boys would line up to swap with this California girl!
6. She would never allow herself to get be aggressively ticketed by Ole Miss Parking.
If Katy Perry was late for her 8 am and parked on the Tad Pad curb, would you really ticket her? No, cause you would definitely hear her “Roar” (get it).
7. If this you saw her at Game Day, imagine Katy getting crazy at Swayze.
We can only assume that by now Katy Perry is now a full blown fanatic of the red and blue, so imagine her in the spring beer showering of the entire Ole Miss student section after a big home game win. Yeah.... Take it all in.
8. She would totally order you drunken pizza on her flex.
First off, I can imagine Katy would have like a lot of extra flex. Second of all, Katy’s just that kind of friend that knows what you need at that time of night because she’s done it for so long. And that thing is a meat lovers special with three extra garlic sauces.
9. She would kick it with you for a chill night.
After all that partying, I can guarantee you on Sunday Katy would kick it with you in JD Williams to study for your math quiz or watch a super bad 80’s movie while you two cook some dinner.
So as a whole, we’d like to thank you, Katy Perry, for coming to Oxford. I hope we showed you a good time. Now we can all stop day dreaming of what it would be like to have you as a classmate and get back to enjoying the rest of our season. God Bless and Hotty Toddy!
PS. Katy, you should speak at our Commencement...just saying.
