Winter break is always something to look forward to. Sometimes, it's only the promise of break that keep us going, that makes us want to wake up in the morning just to be another day closer. Break is a solace. A time for comfort and recuperation. It's a time to fall asleep at 9 p.m. like you haven't done since you were an infant and then not wake up for 20 hours like a modern Rip Van Winkle (Could you even imagine your anxieties/responsibilities allowing you to sleep for 20 years? Please.).

For many, break is also a time to do super cute things with your super cute friends that you've been looking forward to all year. After all, 'tis the season for super cute selfies with perfect lighting thanks to the soft glow of Christmas lights.

For other of us, though, break means something different. Sure, you might get the chance to do a bit of ice skating or even drink some hot cocoa with a dash of peppermint schnapps as the holiday season requires. But, chances are, you'll probably find that your break is less about doing super cute, super fun, holiday-esque activities, and more about suffering the repercussions of post-finals stress. This could mean anything from finally getting a doctor's appointment to take a look at that cough you've been ignoring to having the full-scale mental breakdown you strategically avoided until you actually had the time to deal with it.

Personally, I'm much more the second type of person, leading my winter break to become something of an amalgamation of mental breaks, engaging in behaviors I cannot justify, fanciful daydreams, and maybe an actual medical procedure or two. For those of you like me, here's a list of things I can already tell are going to happen post-finals. Maybe these will inspire you, but hopefully not.

1. Grumble at every mistletoe I see, in public and otherwise.

Isn't it just kind of weird that we let a plant dictate when we should kiss someone we may or may not even know. What kind of social convention is that? Honestly, it just sounds like an excuse for creeps to get away with some weird behaviors under the guise of holiday spirit. Hallmark movies will probably get you thinking this tradition is cute, whimsical, and/or romantic. But there is nothing at all cute, whimsical, and/or romantic about getting stuck under it with a total stranger who decides to act upon it (You might disagree, but let it be known that you can't change my mind--I'm actually just a Grinch).

2. Get three fillings.

On the upside, my new dentist is really cute. On the downside, there is nothing glamorous about filling a cavity. There's way too many needles and way too much saliva involved for anything to be considered even mildly cute or fun. It's mostly just a source of embarrassment, especially when you realize that you're not even that much younger than the dentist or the dental hygienists and the fact that you have laughable oral health is no longer acceptable, it's just a bummer.

3. Rent at least six books I won't read.

I don't know why I ever think I will actually be the kind of person who does the whole reading-a-book-by-the-fire-at-some-cute-old-bookstore-with-snow-lightly-falling-outside thing. I am not and never have been like this. I rarely even want to leave my home. But something about the holidays makes me optimistic that things will change and that I will actually read all the books I've rented from the campus library.

4. Go to IHOP.

I'm going to IHOP if it kills me. If I'm lucky, it might just kill me anyway; I'd love to go out via an IHOP-related disaster. I truly cannot tell you how many times I have lied awake this semester, dreaming of the International House of Pancakes and lamenting that the nearest one to me for 8 months out of the year is 1.5 hours away. I'm ready to tear this place up. I'm ready to eat delicious food until I am passed out in that blue vinyl booth, scaring the group of senior citizens across the aisle.

5. Pretend I don't know people from my high school when I see them out Christmas shopping.

You'd think that having been out of high school for 3.5 years now, I'd be way better about handling the possibility of running into people from the past. I'm not, though. It's actually remarkable, the lengths I will go to to avoid unwanted human interaction. My mom doesn't understand this, but the thought of having to make small talk with a person who vaguely looks like someone from my graduating class of nearly 500 in the perfume department of Macy's gives me the nervous sweats.

6. Listen to the entirety of One Direction's discography straight through.

This one is more of an abstract feeling than an actual plan. I'm just getting to that point where it's been too long since I've done it and simultaneously approaching the necessary level of emotional vacancy to find myself in that dark place again. You know how when you love something, you're supposed to let it go? I don't think I have ever let any boyband slip through my chubby little fingers, even after they've broken up. Anyway, how long until they reunite to release a Christmas album?

7. Talk myself in and out of adopting a bird.

It would be absolutely impractical for me to adopt any animal at this point in my life. However, that does not mean it wouldn't be cool as hell to start my life path as a crazy bird lady. We don't have enough of those, in my opinion. Plus, maybe if one bird works out, I could start picking up falconry as a hobby. People would be so scared to come over, I'd never have to worry about hosting events at my apartment. Plus, a falcon probably wouldn't care for mistletoe either.

8. Memorize the linguistic definition of "meme."

Why spend the holidays spreading joy and cheer to all when you could wow your friends with the formal definition of "meme"? What is the point of attending family gatherings if you can't just whip out this handy definition whenever you want to? Clearly, this is a much better use of my time than anything else could be, and everyone I know will definitely thank me for knowing it and enriching their lives. 'Tis the season, you know?

Happy Holidays, have an awesome break!