2016 was a difficult year for many of us. From all the deaths that occurred to the crazy election year, a lot of people are probably finding themselves hurting, broken, trying to find any ounce of hope they can and praying that 2017 is a much better and brighter year.
I too have felt discouraged, hurt, broken, hopeless at times throughout this year. But oftentimes, the best lessons we learn in life come from the darkest times in our lives.
All that said, here's some things I have learned in this crazy year.
1. Do not push yourself too much or too hard. I have had to learn this the hard way. I try so hard to be the best daughter, sister, student, friend, etc. I can be but I have my limits, and pushing myself past those limits can result in some health problem(s) flaring up and leaving me utterly exhausted and unable to do anything, which leaves me discouraged and upset, and it just becomes a vicious cycle. I've learned and still am learning about balance--balancing alone time and time spent with others, balancing sleep and dietary habits, balancing time spent between work, play, and rest, etc. This is certainly not an easy thing to learn but it is incredibly important.
2. Everything is not your fault. You are responsible for your words and actions. No matter how much other people try to get you to take responsibility for things out of your control, that is not yours to take responsibility for.
3. Extend grace and forgiveness to those who need it, including yourself. I've written before about some struggles I've had with forgiveness and grace; I usually am a very gracious and forgiving person, but I am also very sensitive and have to be careful to not be so sensitive that I find myself holding a grudge rather than forgiving and showing grace. And sometimes I am the hardest person to show grace and forgiveness to, but I am learning day by day that nobody is perfect and we all need grace and forgiveness sometimes. We all mess up, we all blow it, and we all need to be corrected lovingly and also shown forgiveness and grace.
4. God is good and faithful...always. There were days when I felt like I couldn't even bring myself to the Lord, and yet He still remained good and faithful. No matter how hurt, upset, broken, discouraged, sick, sad, or anything else at all that I felt, He was always there, never leaving my side. He reminded me of His love, He spoke gently with me, He was so kind. Even when it seemed like no one was for me, He always was. He always has had and always will have such deep, powerful love for me. He is, in fact, the very essence of love. And that is enough.
5. I will never have it all together, and neither will anyone else, and that's okay. If I had a dollar for every time I've thought, "I'll just do x, y, and z, and then I'll have my life together and everything will be fine!" I'd be filthy rich. Let me tell you, those plans of mine have never worked--not once. I believe at least in part that that is because my plans were self-centered rather than Christ-centered. I hate to say that but it is the truth. I hope that in the future I will remember to always rely on Him and not on myself. I want to keep in mind Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight."
6. It's okay to not be okay. These words can be so comforting, particularly to those facing any sort of chronic physical and/or mental illness(es). It's okay if some nights are spent crying yourself to sleep. It's okay if some days you can't eat as much as other days. It's okay if some days you just need to be left alone. It's okay if some days you don't know if you can make it out of bed or take a shower or get dressed. How you feel is real and valid and needs to be properly taken care of, but remember it won't last forever. Take care of yourself appropriately in each and every moment. It's okay if you aren't okay right now; get all the help you need, and sooner or later you will be okay.
7. God is a God of intention. It seems that, especially in 2016, a lot of people were strongly opposed to the phrase "everything happens for a reason." While I have not experienced absolutely everything and cannot say for sure whether everything truly does happen for a reason, I think what is more important than whether something has a reason for occurring is that God is a God of intention. Maybe something happened to you that in and of itself has no meaning, no purpose, no reason, but God can give it that. He can use it all for good. He can bring beauty from ashes. He is good and trustworthy. Even when we don't understand what is going on, we can trust that He is being intentional in all He says and does and in all that He isn't saying and isn't doing.
Regardless of how the next 12 months go or what they feel like, I pray for more lessons learned, more wisdom gained, and a stronger relationship with the Lord.
