1. The first time you realize you're actually adopting a dog, you go insane at the nearest pet store. You buy anything you think your dog could need (including dandruff shampoo and a $30 dog toy that he doesn't even like).

2. The first night you spend with your new pal, you wake up constantly to check on him and make sure he's sleeping okay. Even though he won't be comfortable on anything, you've laid out every blanket you own and have dog toys precariously placed around your house in case he wakes up and gets scared.

3. The first time you go on a successful walk, you feel like the ultimate parent! He didn't bark at any other dogs, he only pulled you across two parking lots, and you picked up his poop without getting any on your hands! You're the dream team of dogs and people.

4. The first time you schedule (and go to) a vet appointment. Why is it easier to schedule appointments for your (animal) children? I might not be able to schedule my own dentist appointments, but I can rattle on for 20 minutes over the phone about my pup. And then the day comes when the appointment happens... will he bark at other dogs? Will he pee on the floor? Will his vet be mean? Will he bark and wail for me when he goes back? Is this what it's like to be a parent of a human child? Such worry. Very dog parent.

5. The first time your pup gets sick is the worst. You feel like a complete failure, even if he got heartworm from the undetermined amount of time he was living outside. You want to ask him how he's feeling... but dog language gets in the way. Basically, he walks on water. He can sleep on the bed, gets treats all the time, and has unlimited vouchers for puppy dog eyes.

6. The first time he voluntarily comes to you. The heavens have opened, the angels are singing, and you are the gods of dogs. Your pup loves you and you accept the role as his pillow.