Hand over the oscar Meryl Streep, draw the broadway curtains because nothing can top such an amazing performance as yours. Everything in life is a production, people just don't understand.
1. Everything is a disaster
Did the bus run two minutes later? Disaster. Did you just accidentally yank your headphones out of your ear? Disaster. Did you literally just break your hair tie as you were putting your hair up? DISASTER!!! This is not a drill people, every small inconvenience can and will upset the balance of time and life as we know it.
2. You draw out every vowel and consonant of a word.
You just caaannot buuhhleeaaavveee your DVR didn’t record that episode of the bachelor. You cuh-learly pressed the little red thing. Why do bad things happen to good peeeopppllluuuhhh??
3. Everything is literal
You've literally been waiting a million years for your friends to get ready and leave. If you don't eat something now you are literally going to die.
4. Any wrong doing to you is an injustice to society.
Did they seriously just take your seat after you’ve literally been sitting there the entire semester. This is a direct attack. You’re entire perception of this person has changed, you can cuhlearly never be friends with such a shady person
5. You use "truly" and "honestly" for a stronger impact
Honestly you're not dramatic everyone is just unaware of how intense your life really is. You Honestly are the least dramatic person you know

























