The 5 Stages of Grief After Getting Through Your First Week of Classes

If you're anything like me, and you're starting your first semester of the new school year, it can feel like a lot is happening at once. That's because it is. It can be so much that you even begin the stages of grief like I did just this week when I got all of my class syllabi. More or less, here's how it all went down.

Denial

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It's not so bad. I've done more than this before. It's not as bad as it was last semester. At least, it's not as bad as it looks. Okay, it does look pretty bad, but that's only because everything I have to do is sitting here in front of me. Once I actually start doing it and I gradually start checking things off my list, it won't be as bad as I thought....right?

Anger

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What the hell is this?!? Why would they give me so much to do?! Don't they know how busy I already am??!! This is bullcrap! I hate this! Screw my professors and screw anyone who's ever loved them!! And why the hell did I buy $300 dollars worth of textbooks?! I'm only using each one for like a week! This whole thing is a scam! Screw college and my student loans and the education system as a whole! We have nothing to break but our chains!!!

Bartering

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Look, I'll level with the voice inside my head. If I can get all of this done and you don't completely fold on me, we'll do something cool to reward us. We'll get ice cream, or see a movie, or get drunk, or.....yeah we're getting drunk. Just remember to turn in that important paper and all the Hennessy in the store will be yours.

Depression

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This is it. My life is over. There's no way I can pass all of these classes. I might as well drop out now. With no degree I'll be forced to work minimum wage and live in a studio apartment by myself watching Bojack Horseman forever....except it will be worse than when I do it now. Wait, no, it'll be worse. I'll have to join the circus and be a part of the freak show, but I'm not freaky. I'm just kind of gross so they'll kick me out of there too. I'll be poor and homeless and alone and I want Taco Bell.

Acceptance

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Wow, that Taco Bell really cleared my head. Maybe I overreacted a little bit. Look, this semester is probably gonna suck sometimes, and there will be times that I feel like breaking down or that I'm in over my head, but I can do this. I have the power, the knowledge, and the will to get all of this done. I've felt like this before, I've succeeded before, and I can succeed again.

If I was able to get through it, then so can you. Go show this semester who's boss, and get some Taco Bell too that stuff works wonders.