In light of the recent article 20 Things Every New Franciscan Student Should Know, I thought it was about time someone addressed a few myths that seem to be passed down through generations of students. I have lived here for 20 years and it is with great pleasure that I show you why I love where I live.

Hello everyone, welcome to my home.

Myth #1: There isn’t a decent night life.

A decent night life? I didn't know students could afford such things. Where does one even find a decent night life that costs less than a Taco Bell burrito and free coffee? Maybe someone in Steubenville should open a bar that accepts old household t-shirts in exchange for a beer or two...

Kidding aside, if you’re part of the 0.3% of students who can both drive off campus AND pay for a nice date, congratulations! You’re only 40 minutes away from a night on the town in either Pittsburgh, PA or Wheeling, WV. Unfortunately, I would have to agree that there isn't much to do within the Steubenville city limits in the way of a night life, but for starters, you could try out one of the many locally owned restaurants such as Froehlich’s Classic Corner (now offering College Night specials), Scaffidi's, or Malta’s Pizza. There are also quite a few local groups who host dances, wine and beer tastings, and concerts on a regular basis, it just takes a bit more time and effort to locate such events.

It may interest you to know that a very invested group of individuals is working day and night to restore the historic downtown area of Steubenville - this will result in the re-opening of the Grand Theater, a hoppin’ music and dance hall, and the most hipster coffee shop that ever, er, hipstered?

Myth #2: The weather is more bipolar than that crazy relative you only see at family funerals.

While temperatures here can occasionally reach opposite extremes in a 6 hour period, this weather isn’t unique to Steubenville and we don’t want to claim that as a tourist attraction. Try going anywhere else in the Midwest without experiencing similar weather patterns. I know it’s hard to plan your outfits a day in advance and break the habit of wearing flip-flops year-round, but at least we don’t have hurricanes, tornadoes, tsunamis, or earthquakes! We might be able to build nightclubs and throw criminals in jail to improve your opinion of the city, but we can’t change the weather. If the temperature really bothers you, feel free to take it up with God. Or just go to school somewhere else.

"If you don't like the weather in New England now, just wait a few minutes." - Mark Twain

Myth #3: The water is toxic.

The Steubenville public water system sources water directly from the Ohio River (at mile 65.3 to be specific), treats it for all the federally recognized contaminants and sends it off to you poor, unsuspecting drinkers. This same river runs through six states and is the source of drinking water for over 3 million people, none of whom have reported any extra limbs or queer side effects, I might add. Our river has played a significant role throughout history in the lives of settlers and natives alike who formed civilizations on its banks and depended on the water for survival. The “Ohio River” title comes from the Iroquois word meaning “good river.” I have lived in Steubenville my entire life, drinking, showering, and swimming in this glorified “toxic” water, and I am sorry to say I haven’t grown a third eye or even developed a green pallor. But I’ll keep you all posted on my personal blog www.21YearsOfRiverWaterAndStillGoingStrong.com (ok, I was kidding).

Here are a few extra resources to help you determine the safety of drinking Steubenville water:

Steubenville City Water Department Consumer Confidence Report

Is It Safe To Swim In The Ohio River?

Ohio River Water Quality

Myth #4: Walking off campus leads nowhere except to your potential murder.

Steubenville isn’t Gotham City, people. Our 2014 average shows that for every 100,000 people, there are 10.22 daily crimes - that’s 1 crime for every 9,785 people, and there are only 18,000 people in Steubenville, including you. That’s not even 2 cases per day, and a majority of the local crimes are property related!

If your own highly informed opinion still renders locals as “Steuben-villains”, now is your chance to break out the religious batman we know dwells in all of us. One of the simplest ways to combat evil is by establishing the presence of good. Remember how hard it was to steal cookies when your goodie two-shoes sister was always hanging around? If Steubenville streets were teeming with Franciscan students, it wouldn't be long before crime here disappeared. Walking off campus is also an opportunity to be a witness to souls who can’t afford to believe in a life beyond addiction-numbed suffering. Are we not called to preach the Gospel at all times and in all places?

I would, of course, advise you to take the same safety precautions that any individual ought to consider before heading out into the world: inform a friend, bring a phone, take along your measly education in self-defense, and don’t forget that pocket-sized bottle of holy water from grandma!

Myth #5: AKA Stupidville.

I'm going to be completely honest and admit that I'm not exactly clear on the meaning of "Stupidville." Unless the noxious properties of the aforementioned water have been proved lethal to the brain cells of every single citizen, no one can claim that the local population is a conglomeration of half-wits. You could surmise that the City of Steubenville was a stupid decision in the first place, but it's difficult to back up that assertion with hard evidence. You could also say that Steubenville has "no point," but at the very least it provides a geographic location for the school you are going to - a school that would otherwise not exist.

In closing, I know "Stupidville" is fun to say and it made for some apparently bad-a** t-shirts at the summer youth conferences, but let's take a moment to appreciate the fact that none of us are in grade school anymore, thus rendering name-calling obsolete. It would do you well to remember that moving into any new city and publicly referring to it with derogatory terms is like walking into a house as a guest and calling your hostess fat. You'd be lucky if they fed you at all and I wouldn't expect another invitation for supper. You might be a guest in Steubenville, but don't expect service on a silver platter with an attitude like that.