48 Signs You Go To Elon
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48 Signs You Go To Elon

The story behind a southern school filled with Northerners wearing pastel prints.

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48 Signs You Go To Elon

Every fall, a small population of men, a large population of women, and an overwhelming population of squirrels commute from "right outside of Boston" to attend Elon University. Elon is best known for its beautiful campus and elaborate fountains, along with side noting your school pride with, "it's in North Carolina." (Because there is a very good chance that you are not from North Carolina.) As we spend our summers away, we attempt to describe the place to which we cannot wait to return. However, it seems as if only Elon understands Elon, and here's why.

The 48 signs you go to Elon University:

  1. You would sell your left arm for an elliptical after 4 p.m.
  2. The dining hall workers are the only people who call you pet names.
  3. 8 a.m. parka followed by 12:25 p.m. t-shirt and shorts.
  4. You have witnessed freshman boys offer up their souls to get into frat parties.
  5. You’ve momentarily fallen in love every time Rip Chord preforms.
  6. You’re convinced that Elon Secure has a vendetta against you.
  7. Your newsfeed is attacked with fountain pictures the second the weather turns warm.
  8. You will see more sorority apparel at the gym than actual work out clothes.
  9. You have been left/almost run over/personally victimized by the Bio Bus.
  10. Target is the only place you shop from August through late May.
  11. You've danced for over 24 hours #FTK.
  12. Your friends are confused by the fact that the coffee shop you study in is also a bar.
  13. Nothing can cure a hangover like Colonnades breakfast or West End Brunch.
  14. You get way more into Greek week dance than any Elon sporting event.
  15. You know someone who has been attacked by the swan.
  16. Walking on the grass is equivalent to trespassing.
  17. You've studied on The Boobs.
  18. Getting the class schedule you want is just as likely as never receiving a Smith Jackson email again.
  19. You've made the mistake of walking past the fundraising tables in Moseley and was forced to donate…to everything.
  20. You're committed to trying all 100 flavors at Pelicans before graduation.
  21. When you talk about your friends, you refer to their Greek affiliation so people know who they are.
  22. You would rather pay for Irazu with real money than drink Acorn coffee for a swipe.
  23. You’ve blamed late night for causing your freshman fifteen.
  24. Cookout is your 2 a.m. promised land.
  25. You've worked harder on a banquet cooler than any class assignment.
  26. You can barley even hear the train anymore.
  27. You've studied abroad AT LEAST once.
  28. You used to be an 8, but became a 6 when you met the other girls on campus.
  29. Spotting Leo around campus is equivalent to a celebrity sighting.
  30. You say "hi" to at least five people on the way to class.
  31. You thought it was cool to steal a brick.
  32. And probably got fined for it.
  33. You are personally offended when people pronounce it "uh-lon."
  34. You've swam in at least one fountain.
  35. You're convinced that our campus keeps Vineyard Vines in business.
  36. You've started saying "y'all,” and probably picked it up from your Northern friends.
  37. You ran out of meal dollars a month into the semester.
  38. Day drinks mean live bands, puppies, snow cones, and slip n' slides.
  39. Parties are attended by more Burlies than guys.
  40. You complain about a 10 minute walk on campus.
  41. Festivus is your Christmas.
  42. Walking past Smith you may find an assortment of desks, chairs, water fountain parts and a soda machine or two laying in the lawn.
  43. You wear miscellaneous costumes and accessories to parties regularly.
  44. Bucket is your favorite drink.
  45. You have a pair of designated going-out shoes.
  46. Those shoes are ruined.
  47. You know that finding a nice, handsome, straight boy is like finding a mythical creature.
  48. You wouldn’t trade long nights at Club Belk, caring and quirky professors, amazing friends or incredible opportunities for the world.
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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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