This week I began the hellish process otherwise known as moving into your college dorm. There were laughs. There were tears (mostly about all the money I had to spend at Target). There were stubbed toes and sore muscles. Why do we even put ourselves through this? Oh yeah, because we have to live somewhere.
1. Yes! I see campus. I'm almost to campus!
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2. I can't wait to see my friends. It's been months. Texting just doesn't quite cut it.
3. Wait. I saw Harkness Tower like half an hour ago. Why are we not there yet?
4. Oh. Duh. Freshman traffic. I forgot about Freshman Move-In Day. May as well forget about seeing my friends until I'm 50.
5. Finally! Only a block away.
6. Oh no. There's nowhere to park. Nowhere. Absolutely nowhere.
7. So this is why parallel parking is on the driving test. We don't have to parallel park in Iowa. Iowa parking is superior to any other parking on the planet because it doesn't involve this ridiculous concept of "parallel." In a parallel universe, there is no such thing as parallel parking.
8. Ha! Found a parking spot. It's only 17.4 blocks away. Good thing I brought my dad to lift all of this heavy stuff.
9. Wait. He's handing me 14,000 different things. Does he really think I can carry all of those things? Who even owns that many things? Oh wait, I do.
10. He's giving me dirty looks. He heard all of the shoes rattling around in that box. Whoops.
11. These have got to be the longest city blocks on the entire planet. Maybe I should just give up and only take 3.4 shirts and a pair of pants. That's enough to live with for the rest of the year right?
12. Why do I own so many shoes?
13. Finally! The dorm is in sight. Oh God. How am I going to get to my ID so I can get through the door. It has about 17 layers of bags on top of it.
14. Thank god my room is on the first floor.
15. Oh good, only 27 more trips to the car.
16. Phew! All that stuff's in. Now lets start unpacking.
17. Oh wait. I can't unpack until the movers bring those boxes I stored with the thingy that holds all my other thingies. Guess that's what tomorrow's for.
18. And I need some other stuff. Like 5 fans because I forgot that college dorms haven't discovered this miracle called air conditioning.
19. And school supplies. I probably need those too. Maybe we should just plan on bringing in another carload.
20. $19,284 later. I think I probably have everything I could possibly need. Damn it. I forgot pens. And light bulbs. And a pillow. I suppose we'll have to go back for Round 2.
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21. But first, let me put my stuff away.
22. Nope, still waiting on the thingy in the storage box that holds all the other thingies.
23. Unpacking time! The storage boxes are delivered. Now the real stuff can start.
*Pulls out 37 things I just bought at Target and already unwrapped the day before.*
24. Oh. I guess I didn't need to buy all those things. I forgot, I had lots leftover and left them in storage. Did someone say yard sale? No?
25. Good thing I have 90,000 AA batteries because I still don't have a pillow...
26. It's such a disaster zone in here. I'm never going to fit everything.
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27. Ugh. And we still need to buy a futon. How did we forget about the futon?
28. Oh. My parents are done for the day. Guess that means I can be done for the day, too.
29. I love Netflix. It is so good at taking my mind off of all of those things crowded around the foot of my bed that I should be putting away.
30. Okay, it's a new day. It's time to pack.
31. Oh good! Another distraction. Time to go pick up a futon.
32. NOOOOOO! My parents are leaving. Now I have no one to help me unpack. Why did I procrastinate?
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33. I have always liked the moving box look. Very hobo-chic. I can probably just live out of boxes for the next year.
34. Ouch. Just stubbed my toe. Fine! I'll put away the stuff in the boxes.
*Unpacks one box*
35. Yep, that's enough for the day. Time for Netflix. Maybe everything will get put away by midterms. Maybe.
DISCLAIMER: Still haven't finished unpacking. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. The world may never know.